Everyone and their brother has been telling me I have to read these Dragon Tattoo books. So I finally bought them and settled down to be amazed. What decided me was my sister-in-law, who I consider a pretty smart lady, telling me that she was sad that she couldn’t read any more of the Tattoo books since Stieg Larsson was dead.
So I start the first book. I pushed through the first 75 or so pages, bored almost to tears, and the book finally got a little interesting. My favorite book in the series… but I’m not sure that’s saying much, really.
I start the second book, a little excited, since Salander broke out of her shell a little and decided she was in love with Blomkvist, only to be hurt by his ongoing affair with Berger. I got more and more frustrated as the most interesting character, Lisbeth, was MIA in two thirds of the **** book. And the ending… well let’s just say if I didn’t have the third book readily available, I probably would’ve found Stieg Larsson’s dead body and put a cap in his *** for good measure. The book wasn’t great, but it didn’t suck.
On to the third book. Technically, I haven’t finished it yet. I still have about 30 pages to go. And I feel like I am punishing myself for reading it.
In the course of these three books, I have come to realize a few things.
1. Stieg Larsson is impressed by people’s resumes and insists on putting them down on paper in his books. Honestly, I don’t give a **** what grammar school so-and-so went to. They work for the SIS now? Great. That’s all I need to know.
2. Stieg Larsson thinks that a person’s grocery list is integral to plot progression.
3. People in Sweden love something called “Billy’s Pan Pizza.”
4. All of the men in Sweden fall into two catagoris: (a) men who are the paragon of all that is good and right in the world, and (b) misogynist pigs who like to use the word ***** to describe every woman who crosses them.
5. Every woman wants to sleep with Mikael Blomkvist.
Seriously, these books are not something I’d recommend to anyone I liked.