Everyone and their brother has been telling me I have to read these Dragon Tattoo books. So I finally bought them and settled down to be amazed. What decided me was my sister-in-law, who I consider a pretty smart lady, telling me that she was sad that she couldn’t read any more of the Tattoo books since Stieg Larsson was dead.
So I start the first book. I pushed through the first 75 or so pages, bored almost to tears, and the book finally got a little interesting. My favorite book in the series… but I’m not sure that’s saying much, really.
I start the second book, a little excited, since Salander broke out of her shell a little and decided she was in love with Blomkvist, only to be hurt by his ongoing affair with Berger. I got more and more frustrated as the most interesting character, Lisbeth, was MIA in two thirds of the **** book. And the ending… well let’s just say if I didn’t have the third book readily available, I probably would’ve found Stieg Larsson’s dead body and put a cap in his **** for good measure. The book wasn’t great, but it didn’t suck.
On to the third book. Technically, I haven’t finished it yet. I still have about 30 pages to go. And I feel like I am punishing myself for reading it.
In the course of these three books, I have come to realize a few things.
1. Stieg Larsson is impressed by people’s resumes and insists on putting them down on paper in his books. Honestly, I don’t give a **** what grammar school so-and-so went to. They work for the SIS now? Great. That’s all I need to know.
2. Stieg Larsson thinks that a person’s grocery list is integral to plot progression.
3. People in Sweden love something called “Billy’s Pan Pizza.”
4. All of the men in Sweden fall into two catagoris: (a) men who are the paragon of all that is good and right in the world, and (b) misogynist pigs who like to use the word whore to describe every woman who crosses them.
5. Every woman wants to sleep with Mikael Blomkvist.
Seriously, these books are not something I’d recommend to anyone I liked.