After some suppressed memories began popping up, I have finally been able to form my thoughts and feelings into words. Going back 3-4 years I have been using the same riff on my guitar to warm up, so I chose to put words to it tonight. I feel pretty good about it, and kind of emotionally better I put it down into words. As for the story of the song it involves summer love, and later an emotional lock down. For the better part of 10 years ive not really got emotionally close to anyone, sure ive done pretty well for myself, but its not the same thing ya know what im saying.
Its weird, I haven't thought about her for like 3 years or more, ever since I pretty much said enough is enough you are @#%^ing me up. She was in a sense, she was a very successful tease. But we always did sh*t together, and in the summers it was summer nights at camp (counsellors not kids!). But that was it, we would go out and do sh*t, and we would get closer. What will really bake your noodle is she thought I was the tease and stringing her along.
Essentially we both could not overcome the possibility of destroying something good, and couldn't say those three little words.
But one of us was able to move on, one of us has been emotionally impotent for 10 years. Why am I still hung up on this girl, and why does it end up subconsiously ruining every relationship I have.
That I don't know, and need more weed to think about it.