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#127gbaji, Posted: Jan 30 2013 at 5:49 PM, Rating: Sub-Default, (Expand Post) I think that society's taboos concerning and individual's trauma resulting from non-consensual sexual contact is why we weight rape so heavily against other crimes in the first place. And yes, this does lead to the assumption that since rape is such a horrific violation of the individual that anyone being subjected to it would struggle as much as possible to avoid it. If a woman were to do as you said, it would represent a decision by the woman that the sexual contact she's being subjected to is preferable to whatever other physical harm she might suffer if she resists. She's making that decision. Not me. Not the courts. She is making it. Which counters the assumption we have which causes us to weight rape so heavily in the first place.
#128 Jan 30 2013 at 5:52 PM Rating: Default
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Belkira wrote:
I do think that rape is worse than simple physical assault. It is an assault on a very private and intimate part of a person's body. The very fact that sex is an enjoyable act when consensual is part of that violation.


Agreed. Which is why it's bewildering why some women will choose to submit to the sexual demands of their attacker out of fear of a possible assault if they don't.

Quote:
If someone force-fed me chocolate chip cookies (this is assuming that the force feedin is the other person prying my mouth open and shoving as many cookies as they want down my throst while I cry in pain and fear all the while threatening my life if I make a sound or tell anyone) I imagine it would be quite difficult for me to ever look at another chocolate chip cookie again, let alone eat one.


That would probably leave marks too. /ducks
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#129 Jan 30 2013 at 5:57 PM Rating: Excellent
Gbaji wrote:
Belkira wrote:
I do think that rape is worse than simple physical assault. It is an assault on a very private and intimate part of a person's body. The very fact that sex is an enjoyable act when consensual is part of that violation.


Agreed. Which is why it's bewildering why some women will choose to submit to the sexual demands of their attacker out of fear of a possible assault if they don't.


Gbaji .... what part of rape do you think is choice?

You know what .. I was going to be kind, but I've had a glass or two of wine and you are a complete <insert rude word here> for what you posted (and yes I need to read back a few responses but OMFG)

Gbaji wrote:
Obviously, there are exceptions to this where the woman is unable to resist (she's drugged for instance), but there are a number of cases where a woman chooses to comply with the sexual demands of her attacker out of fear of some other consequence. This absolutely suggests that she placed a greater weight on those other consequences than on the sexual act itself. So the weight of the crime should be less than that which she avoided by submitting to the sexual act.


Now this may be news to you honey, but men are larger and stronger. They can also use weapons. There may be no choice, there may be no ability to resist. So according to your logic, unless you come out with battle scars ... you consented on some level? You reprobate. Smiley: mad

Edited, Jan 30th 2013 7:07pm by JennockFV

Edited, Jan 30th 2013 7:10pm by JennockFV
#130gbaji, Posted: Jan 30 2013 at 6:26 PM, Rating: Sub-Default, (Expand Post) Why? Because I'm pointing out a truth that is uncomfortable for many people to face? Too bad.
#131 Jan 30 2013 at 6:42 PM Rating: Excellent
gbaji wrote:
You just quoted where I explained this quite clearly. I'm presenting a specific scenario, not rape as a whole.


Good for you. You continue to argue about specific scenarios of rape. Because it's not so bad in some circumstances???? Smiley: rolleyes

gbaji wrote:
Ah. Emotion and not reason. Nothing ever changes.


Wall-o-text and a lawyers morals, nothing ever changes.

Gbaji wrote:
I never said that. I said that if she chose to submit to the sexual demand out of fear of some other consequence, that she must have feared that other consequence *more* than the sexual demand. That's not consent. That's a choice. That the choice is between two bad options doesn't change that fact.


Easy to say when those choices are those you will never be forced to make.

Gbaji wrote:
Quote:
You reprobate. Smiley: mad


Why? Because I'm pointing out a truth that is uncomfortable for many people to face? Too bad.


Actually no, many have faced rape. Not many have faced it with such questionable judgement as yourself however.


Edited, Jan 30th 2013 7:44pm by JennockFV
#132gbaji, Posted: Jan 30 2013 at 6:51 PM, Rating: Sub-Default, (Expand Post) Aside from being a really silly personal attack, I'm not sure what your point is. Is my statement about choice wrong? You've failed to actually address what I said, and are instead just slinging personal invectives at me in lieu of anything rational. Can you at least try to address what I'm actually saying instead of just knee-jerk reacting?
#133 Jan 30 2013 at 7:00 PM Rating: Excellent
Gbaji wrote:
Aside from being a really silly personal attack, I'm not sure what your point is. Is my statement about choice wrong? You've failed to actually address what I said, and are instead just slinging personal invectives at me in lieu of anything rational. Can you at least try to address what I'm actually saying instead of just knee-jerk reacting?


Okay, so let's take just one part of a statement you made:

Gbaji wrote:
Not to mention, from a legal perspective, we can only consider what can be proven to be true. Just because someone claims that someone else would have done something bad to them if they didn't do something (like submit to sex) that doesn't constitute proof


Gbaji, now I hope this never happens to you, but I would be interested in what your reaction would be if you had a person walk into your office and put a gun against your head and demand that you respond on allas with a single word reply else they blow your brains out I know it would be hard but I have a feeling you would submit. This would be your choice apparently and purely just a claim of someone willing to blow your brains out.

#134 Jan 30 2013 at 7:04 PM Rating: Good
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Not to mention, from a legal perspective, we can only consider what can be proven to be true.


Smiley: laugh
#135 Jan 30 2013 at 7:23 PM Rating: Excellent
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gbaji wrote:
I did have the unpleasant experience of being the guy with a gun pointed at him while his girlfriend was forced to make one.

He was just defending his liberty. Don't worry about it.
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#136 Jan 30 2013 at 7:26 PM Rating: Decent
Jophiel wrote:
gbaji wrote:
I did have the unpleasant experience of being the guy with a gun pointed at him while his girlfriend was forced to make one.

He was just defending his liberty. Don't worry about it.

I'm sure he was every bit the law abiding citizen.
#137 Jan 30 2013 at 7:30 PM Rating: Excellent
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What if Obama broke in right then and tried to tax them? Who would have saved them then from the government tyranny?!
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#138 Jan 30 2013 at 7:42 PM Rating: Good
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Smasharoo wrote:

The concept is indeed simple. That's precisely the problem. It's too reductionist. It disregards the obvious complexities of the issue - so much so, in fact, that I had to assume that you were trolling. Rape is traumatic for a variety of reasons, and that's self-evident. Take, for example, the trauma of having one's body used by force against one's will. Or the shock of an intimate action used in a violent, selfish manner? I'm just shooting from the hip here; there are plenty of reasons, and they're not all about petty hangups.


They're not petty. It's such a big deal because you've robbed a women of the only thing society values her for: her sexuality. That's the point. Every cry or "rape isn't funny, ever" or "lots of people don't understand rape" or whatever else to make it clear that it's exceptional thing unlike any other crime just validates the idea that women are meat holes we use to motivate men to do things. If you violate a woman's sexuality, well that's it. You can't do anything worse to her because absolutely nothing else about her has any value.

That's the message you want to send? Really?


Smash being smash.
#139 Jan 30 2013 at 8:06 PM Rating: Decent
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JennockFV wrote:
Okay, so let's take just one part of a statement you made:

Gbaji wrote:
Not to mention, from a legal perspective, we can only consider what can be proven to be true. Just because someone claims that someone else would have done something bad to them if they didn't do something (like submit to sex) that doesn't constitute proof


Gbaji, now I hope this never happens to you, but I would be interested in what your reaction would be if you had a person walk into your office and put a gun against your head and demand that you respond on allas with a single word reply else they blow your brains out I know it would be hard but I have a feeling you would submit.


Of course. Because I am making a choice between two things and I'm more willing to write a one word reply on Alla's than I am willing to have my brains blown out.

Quote:
This would be your choice apparently and purely just a claim of someone willing to blow your brains out.


There are two aspects of this:

1. Assuming I do choose to make a one word reply instead of having my brains blown out, then any third party observer can safely assume that I place greater (negative) weight on having my brains blown out than writing a one word reply. This is why forcing someone to write a one word reply isn't a felony that often results in life in prison and possibly even the death penalty, while blowing someones brains out is. We punish those things differently precisely because one is massively more harmful to the victim than the other, thus we expect a person will choose one over the other quite consistently.

Similarly, we place greater weight on rape than on assault. Rape is considered a more heinous crime and confers a more serious penalty. Thus, just as with the choice you presented, we would assume that someone would choose assault over rape. We'd assume that they'd be willing to suffer some physical pain and injury rather than submit to the sexual demands of their assailant. Hell, they'd do it even if just to make it harder for their assailant to succeed. Thus, if someone says they were raped, but there are no signs of struggle, we might question what really happened. And we certainly might speculate that in the specific case involved, the victim did *not* place as much weight on the sexual act as they did on the potential for physical harm.


2. A claim is a claim. If I walk into a police station accusing my co-worker of putting a gun to my head and forcing me to write a one word reply on this forum, and there's no evidence of this happening other than my word, what do you think will happen? They'll question the other person, and when he says he didn't do it, and there is no evidence to support my claim, they'll let him go. Why assume a different level of evidence is required for a rape case than for any other case? Even if what I'm claiming is absolutely true, from a legal perspective, all that matters is what I can prove is true. That's how our legal system works.

I just think that some people get caught up in some kind of absolute determination of "truth". But in any fair legal system, we can't convict people without proof. It's the whole "innocent until proven guilty" thing. That's all I'm saying here. Again, don't read anything more into it than that. It just seems like far too many people view issues like this as "for" or "against". If I'm not willing to chuck out the rules of evidence and proof in our legal system to protect a rape victim, then I'm "against rape victims" and therefore some kind of monster who is in favor of rape. No. I'm for fair justice. If the evidence is sufficient to prove that someone committed rape, then we should punish them harshly. But if the evidence is insufficient, then we shouldn't.



What's wrong with that? I really think you're reading far more into my posts than is actually there.
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#140 Jan 30 2013 at 8:21 PM Rating: Excellent
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gbaji wrote:
Because I am making a choice between two things and I'm more willing to write a one word reply on Alla's than I am willing to have my brains blown out.
A choice between something you never do and something you never use. Must have been excruciating trying to decide.
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#141 Jan 30 2013 at 10:42 PM Rating: Excellent
Gbaji wrote:
I said that if she chose to submit to the sexual demand out of fear of some other consequence, that she must have feared that other consequence *more* than the sexual demand. That's not consent. That's a choice. That the choice is between two bad options doesn't change that fact.


Because someone settles for a raping instead of pain might make it "less" of a rape when it comes to sentencing, if that makes you happy, but i doubt the victim feels that way. I disagree, but there's always a chance there's another ******* on the jury that doesn't.
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#142 Jan 31 2013 at 6:14 AM Rating: Decent
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I may never be forced to make such a choice, but I did have the unpleasant experience of being the guy with a gun pointed at him while his girlfriend was forced to make one.

Since it's you, I'm going to assume that in about 10 more posts that it'll be revealed that in fact it was a pepper gun and the choice she had to make involved Parmesan cheese at the Old Spaghetti Factory.
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To make a long story short, I don't take any responsibility for anything I post here. It's not news, it's not truth, it's not serious. It's parody. It's satire. It's bitter. It's angsty. Your mother's a *****. You like to jack off dogs. That's right, you heard me. You like to grab that dog by the bone and rub it like a ski pole. Your dad? Gay. Your priest? Straight. **** off and let me post. It's not true, it's all in good fun. Now go away.

#143 Jan 31 2013 at 8:04 AM Rating: Good
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Smasharoo wrote:
I may never be forced to make such a choice, but I did have the unpleasant experience of being the guy with a gun pointed at him while his girlfriend was forced to make one.

Since it's you, I'm going to assume that in about 10 more posts that it'll be revealed that in fact it was a pepper gun and the choice she had to make involved Parmesan cheese at the Old Spaghetti Factory.

For what it's worth, gbaji has mentioned this event before. If I recall correctly, the story has remained consistent.

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#144 Jan 31 2013 at 8:07 AM Rating: Excellent
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It is, in fact, the only time I can remember where Gbaji references a romantic relationship.
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Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#145 Jan 31 2013 at 9:38 AM Rating: Excellent
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And it required a gun to his head.
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#146 Jan 31 2013 at 11:47 AM Rating: Good
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Gbaji, I rarely address you specifically, but this time? You go too far.

If I am understanding you correctly, you are arguing that somehow rape isn't so bad if the woman manages to make it out of the ordeal alive. I cannot believe that even you could say something so absolutely insulting and disgusting.

So if I am forced to the ground, penetrated viciously and I fail to fight back after the attacker I can't even see says "make one sound and you'll die", it's not really much of a crime at all. After all, I could have chosen to die instead of just being raped, right?

You know what? With attitudes like yours, I might as well have. Shame on you sir. Shame on you.

And as for Elinda, I just don't even know what to say to you. Rape isn't the big deal it is just because of some hangups about sex. It's the big deal it is because if I don't want to have sex with someone I don't want to have sex with them regardless of whether my consentual activites involve never having the lights on or not. It's about a woman's choice being forcefully taken away by someone who doesn't have the right to choose for her. Even if we lived in a society that encouraged random acts of sex on the street, if one party involved said no and the act continued depite it, it becomes a violation.

Edited, Jan 31st 2013 12:59pm by Torrence
#147 Jan 31 2013 at 12:20 PM Rating: Decent
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And as for Elinda, I just don't even know what to say to you. Rape isn't the big deal it is just because of some hangups about sex. It's the big deal it is because if I don't want to have sex with someone I don't want to have sex with them regardless of whether my consentual activites involve never having the lights on or not. It's about a woman's choice being forcefully taken away by someone who doesn't have the right to choose for her. Even if we lived in a society that encouraged random acts of sex on the street, if one party involved said no and the act continued depite it, it becomes a violation.

Don't be a moron, it's about scale. No one, Gbaji included, is arguing that it shouldn't be a crime to be forced to have sex, by any means. No one, Gbaji included is arguing it's not a serious crime. What some people are arguing to various degrees is that the *severity* of the crime is out of proportion in our current society. "rape is as bad as murder" is really a fairly common sentiment. It's not a binary situation, something isn't either benign or the worst thing possible. There's a gradient. Is rape worse than being permanently blinded or disfigured? I'd argue that while still being quite horrible, that no, in most cases there's more harm done by cutting someone's eyes out or causing permanent maiming. That view is currently not reflected in our legal code. Why? Is rape involving age of consent without force worse than burning a house to the ground with people inside? Currently as a society we say yes in most cases. That's the issue. The scale of the horror. Not that there is any.
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Disclaimer:

To make a long story short, I don't take any responsibility for anything I post here. It's not news, it's not truth, it's not serious. It's parody. It's satire. It's bitter. It's angsty. Your mother's a *****. You like to jack off dogs. That's right, you heard me. You like to grab that dog by the bone and rub it like a ski pole. Your dad? Gay. Your priest? Straight. **** off and let me post. It's not true, it's all in good fun. Now go away.

#148 Jan 31 2013 at 12:26 PM Rating: Default
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Torrence wrote:

And as for Elinda, I just don't even know what to say to you.


And yet, say stuff you did.


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#149 Jan 31 2013 at 12:29 PM Rating: Good
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Smasharoo wrote:

Is rape worse than being permanently blinded or disfigured?


It sure could be. Rape doesn't just disappear after it's happened, the same as with being blinded or disfigured. If there is transmission of an STD or a pregnancy involved, it's even more permanent. Just because the scars aren't visible to you, doesn't mean they aren't there.


Smasharoo wrote:

Is rape involving age of consent without force worse than burning a house to the ground with people inside? Currently as a society we say yes in most cases. That's the issue. The scale of the horror. Not that there is any.


I'm still trying to figure out wtf you are saying here. Are you talking about statuatory rape? Well, that's a completely separate issue from the rape I (and I think most people in this thread) was talking about. I was talking about the kind of rape where a woman says no, and a man does it anyway. Do I think that a seventeen year old girl begging her mother not to press charges on her nineteen year old boyfriend is something to compare to someone burning people alive? Of course not. Don't be a moron.
#150 Jan 31 2013 at 12:29 PM Rating: Excellent
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Elinda wrote:
Torrence wrote:
And as for Elinda, I just don't even know what to say to you.
And yet, say stuff you did.

It's a Rape Thread miracle!
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Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#151 Jan 31 2013 at 12:34 PM Rating: Good
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