Life SucksFollow

I owe money to four ceditors, gf is leavin me, checking account is overdrawn, its finals week, lakers lost, global warming is increasing..why should I live?

Who borrowed the money?
Who ran her off?
Who spent too much?
Who didn't study?
Who gives a crap?
So?
You tell me.

Apparantly you shouldn't. Do you have easy access to a high, unsecured rooftop? Good. Now all you have to do is go jump off of it.

If you choose this route make sure to rant incoherently about complete nonsense until there is a large crowd. Then throw yourself into the the largest group. At least this way you can give other people something to talk about.

will I feel anything with a .44 Magnum?

just the flames on the other side....

When I was a missionary I taught a guy who had tried to kill himself with a 9mm. Blew out one of his eyes and shattered the top of his skull but didnt kill him. If your gonna use a gun make sure you use something big. Smash's recommendation of a shotgun would suffice.

Heh. I do what I can to help out my fellow man.

So you can:

A: Tell the creditors to **** off when they call you. It's not like we have debtors prisons in this country. The worse they can do is get a judgement against you. And that's not even as bad on your credit as a bankruptcy.

B: Ruin every relationship the GF has until you get bored with it. Show up at the most innopportune moments, pour out your heart publicly (preferrably also drunkenly) and go into a spiteful fit of rage when she spurns you. Loudly proclaim that you hope her herpes medication doesn't work.

C: Quit writing checks and ask the bank to hold them until you can pay them. Whether you do so or not, this may give you a head start on law enforcement. Alternatives are to claim that the GF forged the checks in the first place. See B.

D: Sell answers to to exams. Who cares if you actually HAVE them. You may be able to solve the overdrawn balance with this method. If blamed for wrong answers, point the finger at the GF, who sold them to you and then dumped you.

E: You can't win em all.

F: Invest in suncreen and not-quite beachfront property. As global warming spikes over the next 30 years, reinvest as indicated by sea levels.



Or you could puss out. I'm not exactly sure about that whole afterlife thing. I think it would really suck to go out over some wimp *** 'issues' like you have at the moment to find out you blew your only chance at life. Grow a set. Use em. Shoot off on everything and everybody.

If you had terminal AIDS or cancer or something else that just completely ruins your life before it takes you out, I'd advocate ending it yourself before things got too shabby.

As it stands, I pretty much think those problems are laughable.

I don't even remember who I owe money too anymore, I married my girlfriend and she took away my checking account. Im probably gonna be working for the rest of my life, I lost my last 3 dollars and My A/C has been broken for better than a year.

It gets worse from here on out, Amature....

TStephens, you are my hero.

And about the double-barreled shotty, if I have a freind pull the trigger for me, because , maybe I couldn't pull it, would that be considered murder?

Ummm, yes.

Besides, you can get your toe in there easy. Trust me, I own ten shotguns and have been drunk enough to check it out a few times.

Alternately you could just saw the barrel off. I mean it's not like your worried about the jail time.