The Last SupperFollow

After feeding my parking meter I strolled (limped actually-- I had major chaffing on the inside of my leg from wandering forty years in the desert with those two gentlemen) into Canters. By now the maitre'd recognised me and asked, "The usual table, sir?" I must tipped him less than generously the previous time because he led me to a table waaaaay in the back in what appeared to be the employee break room.

There he was. Yes, I spoke correctly-- there he was.

The final piece to the puzzle was in place. There sat before me was Thundra looking for all the world like a postal inspector-- not a Buddha spouting Zen, not a 19 year old Korean boy, not a 22 year old transvestite named Terry, but a living, breathing member of the United States bureaucracy dedicated to delivering your mail come hell or high water, through rain, snow, sleet, or hail, handguns be damned.

In all honesty, I was surprised. While I had predicted kinda sorta that Thundra would in actuality be this person sitting next to me, I had prepared myself, nay, semi-expected to see a Goth chick wearing a Misfits T-shirt to be there.

And that, in a nutshell, describes the situation. We are all normal folk. Well, Gitslayer isn't considering his twitching eyelid and sibilant esses, but I'm lumping him in with us so as not to confuse you, dear reader.

It turns out that Thundra was falsely framed by Alla for various misdeeds and wrongdoings, resulting in three (count 'em, three!) bannings. The real culprit/mastermind appears to be none other than Kaolian who has subsequently wormed his way into the infrastructure of this board as a mod. Woe is us!

So after the multi-person gay homosexual all-male orgy in the Canter's bathroom, complete with Abu Graif prison reinactment photos with a little old Jewish lady playing the part of Lynndie England, we parted ways and quickly prepared excuses and reasons for our newly inked tattoos with the letters, "A," (me) "L," (Smash) "L," (Git) and "A" (Thundra) on our biceps. Gitslayer has an "L" on his arm because he wanted it to have the double meaning of "loser."

And that pretty much sums up the first-ever Alla's OoT/Asylum board meeting. Any questions?

Totem

You should be. I got to shake Smash's hand, kiss Thundra's ring, and have my table bussed by Git. Jealousy is the order of the day!

Totem

Care for anything to drink, Miss?

Totem

Did Thundra's shirt start out unbuttoned, or is that an "after" picture?

The second I saw the glasses on the head I knew it was Thundra. Tare, if you weren't all the way in canada, then we could have a reunion of our own wink wink nudge nudge.

why the **** am I printing this out and taking it to read on my smoke break??? have i totally lost it? methinks yes.

Aside from Thundra (or whoever is on the far left) who has smooth girlie skin, would it have frickin' killed any of you to shave before going out? And, Smash, get a haircut you damn hippie.

You all look like you just rolled out of bed.

Edited, Thu May 20 14:09:49 2004 by Jophiel

Smooth girly skin?!? That's just sunburn from being coerced into doing a forced road march for 3 hours in the blistering sun.

By-the-by, I got home last night around midnight half frozen to death from driving in 53 degree temperatures for the last two hours of the trip. I promptly jumped into the shower to wash off that icky feeling I had from meeting with those guys and to warm up. My screams of pain as the scalding water poured over my burnt skin woke the entire house up.

But I made it safely home if any of you care.

And I tried to reinact the cover of the Beatle's White album by us crossing Sunset Blvd, but to no avail.

Totem

Edited, Thu May 20 14:18:26 2004 by Totem

That's Abbey Road, my dear.

Oh.

We did pass by Alice Cooper's handprint outside some store selling guitars. We would have pi$$ed in the imprint depression (as a metaphore for Angry's life) and shot pictures of us laughing uproariously about it, but Thundra hadn't arrived yet with his nifty keen ultra-miniaturized digital camera yet.

You should see that thing-- it's about the size of a credit card and not much thicker. It holds bajillions of pictures, has a flash, and an LCD screen to view your shots. Quite nice.

Anyhow, after discussing whether a handful of pi$$ or a lengthy **** was more appropriate and coming to no conclusion, we left in search of more hookers on Sunset Strip.

Totem

We all agreed that he could coordinate the cover story to disguise the big gay orgy.

A likely story, Kao...

/taps his finger on the side of his nose and nods knowingly

Totem

Eh, believe what you will.

So, what was the conversation of the hour anyways? we want a transcript!