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Phyree's Phinal Phantasy Phables: Fishin' BuddiesFollow

#1 Nov 17 2005 at 2:49 PM Rating: Good
251 posts
Ah yes, the indominable Naeo is back at it again only this time Phyree is along for the ride. This one was a quick write-up because it deals with the little nuances of life and our jobs that we all know about and can relate to...not to mention there is some wackiness. Haha, if this keeps up I'll have to start the "Chronicles of Naeonia". =)

Now please enjoy the tongue-in-cheek, short-n-sweet (like a honey-dipped taru) story that is:


Requested by: Naeo
Subject(s): Naeo and Phyree
Genre: Comedy
Setting: Windurst

* * * * *

It was 4:00 in the morning. The sun had yet to rise over the Sea of Bastore. The Cooking Guild's grocery shop was still an hour away from opening to the public. You could see your breath float away on the breeze and feel cold, fresh dew seep through your leather boots to chill your toes. This was the perfect morning to go fishing.

Knuckles gently rapped on Phyree's door. "Ooooh Phy-reeee, ooooh Phy-reeeee. Time to wake uuu-uuuup." Naeo's melodic voice and rhythmic knocking did little to stir the slumbering white mage. "Phyree, it's time to get up. Come on now, you promised we could go fishing this morning. I'm coming in, is that ok?"

A garbled, "Go away, it's early" muffled through the door. Phyree turned over in bed and pulled the covers up. Naeo entered anyway, well-knowing the blonde hume's firebrand temper. Before him seemed to be a chrysalis of cotton. A squirming figure lay totally enshrouded in soft saruta cotton linens.

"Come my little butterfly, you have to get up some time. Besides, you promised we could go fishing."


"What was that?"


"I'm sorry but I don't speak-" he was cut off when a pillow smacked him squarely in the face, staggering him. Phyree's blonde top now peeked out from under the warm blanket. "Hahaha, there she is. Come on now, we have to go soon else we will miss the best time!"

Grumbling, Phyree squirmed out of the cocoon. "Why did I ever agree to this?" She rubbed her eyes, scratched herself, and stretched sloppily in front of the uninterested bard.

"Because I'm your friend and you love to do things with me?" Another pillow in the face was Naeo's reward for his opinion on their friendship.

"Fine. I know you won't leave me alone otherwise. Besides, I need to get up and use the bathroom anyway. Seriously, I don't know why Windurstians have these water fountains in their houses anyway. ****** me off!"

Naeo hummed and waited patiently while Phyree prepared for their aquatic adventure. To make himself useful and stem the tide of predawn obscenities, Naeo made Phyree's bed and tidied up. He was rewarded with a smile and a thank you as Phyree emerged from the restroom dressed in her job's signature red-and-white clothing. "I'm ready."

The unlikely pair strolled from the Residential District to Port Windurst. There they were able to aquire a rental boat, some heavy-duty saltwater rods, and tackle as well as snacks and drinks. Naeo surprised Phyree with his naval abilities as he shoved off the dock and began piloting the vessel out to a good location.

"Wow, where did you learn to handle a boat like this?"

The bard chuckled from embarassment, "Well I kinda new someone in the Republic's Navy...I know my way around a ship, I'll tell you that." His confession opened Naeo up to endless and increasingly cruel jokes from Phyree about hoisting mizenmasts and swabbing poopdecks.

After an hour or so of guiding the currents and tides with a little help from Phyree casting a few low-level Aero spells she picked up from her black mage friends, the impromptu sailors reached their location. Naeo dropped anchor and Phyree used her deft cooking skills to begin preparing bait. The sun had just about cleared the horizon when the first casts were made.

Another hour and the fish weren't biting. Phyree sat leaning forward, her eyes focused purely on the tip of her rod, waiting for the slightest twitch to indicate a strike. Naeo reclined back with his eyes closed and hummed a little sailor's tune. The more serious of the pair shushed the other.

"Shh, Naeo, what are you trying to do? Scare the fish away with all your noise? I swear, you bards..."

"Look honey, white mages aren't exactly the tip of the top either."

Indignant, Phyree responded, "What do you mean? We are irreplaceable! Everyone needs a white mage. You can't adventure without 'em."

Naeo laughed, "Haha, right. Look Phyree, I do most of a white mage's job anyway. Along the way of being a bard I picked up on most of your job's tricks. I even do a lot of your job's duties for you!"

"Oh yeah? Like what Mr. Gaudypants?"

"I cure an awful lot when I am out with other people. I also end up casting a lot of the bar-spells you supposedly are proficient in."

" of the time I just can't do it. I can't be running back and forth, recasting those spells. I'm waaaaay too busy trying to keep our strong fighters from falling. Besides, I haste AND regenerate!"

Naeo smiled under his poofy hat. "Oh is that it? Hun, not only to I run in and out of battle, but I have to keep the mages refreshed, the fighters buffed for combat, and the monsters weakened to hit."

Phyree knew he had a point but she refused to give up. This spirit was one of her most abrasive and endearing qualities. Forgetting the fishing rod, she placed it in a holder and turned around. It was time to get serious. "Yeah but for all that you are so totally replaceable! Have you heard of a little thing called a 'red mage'?"

Naeo just hated being compared to those, what he called them, "brutes". They were not nearly as elegant as bards nor as subtle. To Naeo, red mages were the "smash in the door, kill everyone, then ask questions" type - no better than one of the fighting classes. Sooo not his style. At this insult, he too sat up and turned around.

"Lookee here, missy, red mages have nothing on bards. We don't need to take a knee like they do and we have a wider range of abilities. Plus, we bards aren't wannabe fighters or black mages. And ha! As for them being healers? I'd rather rely on a summoner to heal me than a red mage any day!" He puffed his cheecks out in frustration.

Phyree got him by the ram horn and she both knew and enjoyed it. Naeo saw her evil grin and changed tactics, "But then again, red mages do heal...and haste...and I guess white mages are expendible after all! Ha! And by what? A smelly wannabe, that's what! Mwahaha! On top of that, summoners are able to do some healing and buffing as well! What's that Phyree? I think that's your face over there. Maybe you should try and save it."

"Why you spoony sonofa-" she was cut off as the boat lurched starboard. She had a hit, and it was a big one too! Healing hands wrapped around the fishing pole and boots braces against the side of the boat. The white mage strained with all her might, trying to reel in this catch.

"Need some help," Naeo asked.

"Not from a cheerleader like you, this is varsity-level stuff!"

"Oh well excuuuuuse me!" the hume bard snapped his fingers several times while cocking his head dismissivley.

Phyree gave some very unladylike grunts and strained hard. The boat dipped ever more toward the water on the starboard side. Phyree was lost in her selfish struggle to one-up Naeo so it was up to him to try and correct the situation. He leaned against the port side to weigh it down. All the while he sang a tune that increased Phyree's strength. Her muscles burned with vigor and the fight was on again. The pole jerked left and right but she was wearing down. Burning vigor turned to burning strain and she was sweating profusely. "I won't let this one...get away."

"Phyree, maybe you should take a step back, I'll help." He wasn't given an option as the weary white mage was almost yanked into the water. He shoved her aside and took mastery of the rod.

If she wasn't exhausted, Naeo half-expected a jab from her about that.

Phyree looked over and saw that Naeo was in trouble. The pole was biting deep into his soft, delicate, and well-lotioned hands. Praying to Altana she began a regeneration spell to keep him healthy then hasted his actions to stay ahead of the fish. Stoneskin came next and Phyree's weight increased dramatically, giving them a steady center of gravity.

If he wasn't exausted, Phyree half-expected a jab from him about that.

Together they wrangled in a large shark, a record-breaker they found out back at the guild shop. It was to be stuffed and kept mounted in the Fishing Guild for all to see and praise. Of course, the tarutaru having the sense of humor they do embalzoned on the plaque, "Caught by Naeo and Phyree, Professional Rod Handler and Master Baiter Respectively."

Weary from their trip and having called a truce on their job warfare, they walked back to the Residential District where each would enjoy a noontime nap. Naeo walked the blonde to her room and bid her goodbye.

"Thank you, O Spoony Bard. You always were an able seaman, Naeo," Phyree chittered playfully.

Naeo smiled back, "And you always smell like fish, my dear white mage." Phyree went to respond to the hygenic poke but he closed the door on her and began walking to his own place smiling...

...just another day fishin'.
Hume, Rank 10 San d'Oria
75 WHM (LFM) / 60 BLM (LFG)
20 SAM / 19 MNK, DRK / 18 THF / 13 WAR, RDM, DRG / 12 PLD / 8 NIN, RNG, BLU
Cooking: 93+3, RFH

Fly me to the moon, and let me play among the stars...
#2 Sep 28 2006 at 6:23 AM Rating: Decent
384 posts
<3 Phyree, i love these...more, more!
Naeo & Loury
PUP73 & BRD78
both retired.
Bismarck Server - 8 years in the making.

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#3 Sep 28 2006 at 11:55 AM Rating: Default
687 posts
Awesome ^.^

BLM75 - WAR72 - THF63 - WHM48 - BLU37 - BST55
BRD34 - RDM52 - MNK23 - SAM20 - SMN34 -

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