if you're looking for self-indulgence and reminiscences by some guy you've never met about a weird, unsavory place he went to because he didn't know better, please read on.
Yeah, New York doesn't have too many socially inept bar hoppers, so trying to intimidate doesn't work too well. Though I do agree with milich on the whole party thing. I always bring some **** cheap beer and then just partake in the better stuff that someone else always brings to try to impress everyone else.
reading over that again, i wonder if i'm being clear about what i did in chicago. um... i'm not a very physically intimidating person. i've thrown a few punches in my time, but i have a feeling that (degenerate gamers though you may all be) if i were to come up to any of you and be like "do XXX for me," (with the implicit threat of violence if you failed to comply) you'd be like "lol no".
i rather meant that (many of) the people at my school were rich, pretentious, sheltered idiots with no moral/social/intellectual integrity whatsoever, so when i'd go up to them and commit the faux pas of telling them to buy me a beer they would be so confused by the disruption in their life that they'd actually do it. "buy him a beer? what? ok..." half the time i wouldn't even talk to the buyer, and when i looked to see if they gave a sh*t, i always found that they didn't. they don't care. for one, dropping $3-$5 on a beer isn't sh*t to them. and more importantly, the people in my MA program, the philosophy department, and really the student body as a whole (that i met) predominantly seemed to view me as some sort of strange, foreign animal that never slept, made fun of everyone to their faces for seemingly no reason, had crazy hair and said sh*t that didn't make sense. the professors often sort of liked me because i did very well in class, but most of them looked at me like i was strange/crazy.
now, i'm not some asperger's creepy gamer guy. i'm pretty normal, if perhaps a bit eccentric. regardless, my point in all that self-indulgence/reminiscence is that the people there were so weirded out by me that i could have said "let me take a sh*t in your bed" and they wouldn't have been much more surprised than from "buy me a beer" or anything i said because i was weird (and a jerk). so some people were intimidated that i would belittle them publicly, but the vast majority were just so thrown by the fact that they had entered WEIRD LAND and it was talking to them that they'd just buy the beer.
s. where i'm from it'd be like, "buy me a beer," "who the fuc
k are you?" (interaction ends) unless you're like hitting on someone or something. "oh, pahn, you're from the streets?" no, i mean i'm from not crazy pseudo-intellectual nonsense world
where people study literal nonsense like lacan and are afraid that some guy from hartford might call them an idiot or whatever drives those fuc
king crazy people. seriously, i don't have anywhere near the expressive capability it would require to illustrate how weird "high academia" is if you've never seen it and you live a remotely normal life. also, if you want to read some sh*t, find some transcripts of lacan talking about psychoanalysis. that sh*t doesn't make sense.
i don't mean it's heavily technical, or requires tons of background knowledge. i mean if you went sentence by sentence and logically mapped out the words, you would be unable to discern what the fuc
k the guy was trying to say. it's gibberish! it's not like "bad writing", or "wrong". if you met someone on the street that said sh*t like this guy, you'd run the fuc
k away because some crazy guy is like "you heard about The Real? see it's abstractions and sh*t, you know what i'm saying?" "man, i'm just trying to walk down this street, don't fuc
king kill me." sh*t is crazy! what i'm saying is these fuc
king lunatics owed me those beers. tl;dr
: i didn't physically intimidate people into buying me beer. rather, people at a certain rich school in the slums of chicago are fuc
king weird, so much so that if you insult them to their face, they buy you beer. (just read some of this sh*t. you don't understand it, do you? you might think you're not smart enough, or not well-read enough. try this "garble garble balssalsabablagghblagh." are you smart enough for that? because it means the same thing as that sh*t. and if god forbid you find someone talking about lacan to begin with, and they *actually make sense*, it's because *they're making sh*t up*!! i could tell you i meant "life is meaningless" when i wrote "garble garble", but i didn't; i meant "garble garble". it's called nonsense. it's what babies do before they learn how to talk. people pay 50k/year to learn this sh*t. what the fuck??)
p.s. if you're still reading this absurd post, perhaps you'll forgive a little more self-indulgence. this is an ffxi related story about my time at chicago, so i want to relate it. i lived in a dorm (on the "smoking floor", stay in school kids, don't smoke), which had a common room with internet access. i believe you had to pay for internet in your room, and if you've learned nothing else about me from this post, perhaps you've learned that i'm averse to paying for sh*t. i started in chicago right around the time i started ffxi, so i would regularly go to this large common room to level grind in the fast-paced, thrill a minute XP grind days of 2004. i was also in a fairly intensive MA program (at a school where all the classes were inherently somewhat intensive because of their strange "quarter system" as opposed to the more common semester system), taking philosophy and linguistics classes.
one day well into the year, someone from my MA program passed me by and noticed me playing ffxi. she and i had never talked (or if we had, i didn't remember it...), but we recognized each other because our program was somewhat small and there were lots of sort of group events, many of which included free beer so i was in attendance. she approached me at my table or couch or whatever and said:
<woman> "e---, i always see you at that laptop playing that game, but i never see you doing any work. i'm barely staying above water with all this work, but you seem to do pretty well in class. how the **** do you do it?"
<e---> (me) "i am a genius."
that was one of my proudest moments. addendum, i'm not really a genius, i just don't sleep so i have more time than most people. Edited, May 17th 2009 10:09am by milich