1) If a new poster includes a link to anywhere within their first 20 posts, it's a key logger.
1a) If you have scanned the linked website or have visited it before and believe it to be safe, you are incorrect. The website is just very sneaky. The same applies to all you arrogant Firefox users - yes, you. With the goofy grin on your face and the air of superiority. Don't think we -- I mean they -- aren't on to you.
2) If you have been suspended or banned and come to the forums to complain, we don't care what you have to say. You're at fault. Period. You may either be lying in some attempt to gain sympathy, or you'll make three posts before revealing that, yes, you really did call that annoying person in General chat a "dipsh*t funtlicking caggot" and Blizzard decided to ban you for absolutely no reason. It must be some kind of personal vendetta. Or something.
3) You're an idiot. This one isn't really a rule per se, but it still applies. Recognize that you're an idiot and things will go much more smoothly for you from here on in.
4) You are not an exception to rule 3.
4a) No, not you either.
4b) Look, none of you are, so stop asking me about it.
5) Facts win arguments. Kvetching does not. Look it up, goyim.
5a) 100% of the 'facts' you make up on the spot make you look like an idiot.
5b) In all seriousness, if I see another poster make fifteen paragraph strawman arguments I will smother him with a pillow.
5c) You know who you are.
6) If you're not an elitist, it's because you don't have anything to be proud of.
6a) While you may be of the opinion that the only reason you're not in full Tier 6, downing Illidan twice before breakfast and then going to your 2500-rated Arena teams is because you don't have the time to invest, the rest of us are not.
7) Your story about the one time that thing happened with the guy and the other thing and then that stuff happened is boring. Really, it is. Nobody cares. Nobody will ever care.
7a) We especially do not care about your story about the time the thing happened in the PUG, where that stuff hapepned and then you were all like "watc this" and then they were like "lol" and then that thing with the guy and you were totally like "dude, wtf!??!?!". PUGs suck. It is not an indication that you are good at the game if you managed to be top DPS in a PUG. You can be top DPS in a PUG as a Holy Paladin in healing gear. It is not an indication that anything out of the ordinary happened with Joe PUG ninjas your item for his offspec set, or when that stupid Rogue takes the axe you've been looking for.
8) If your Arena is below 1700, we really don't care what you think about high-end PvP balance. The same applies to PvE if you're working on Gruul but you'll get him down soon! Sure you will, chief. Sure you will.
8a) To be more specific; you're more than entitled to talk about your experiences, but feel free to not draw a straight line between "well, at 1421 rating and with 12 Resilience this happened" and what PvP or PvE looks like when you're actually working at it.
9) Rule 9 is classified.
10) But most importantly, have fun!
10a) No, really. The point of the game is to have fun, not to turn it into Work (or School) 2.0. If you feel like playing is a chore rather than entertainment, turn it off and take a week off. Yes, a week. Your guildies will understand; At the end of the week, see if you want to go back. If you don't, take another week. At some point you'll realize that you either don't want to go back, ever, in which case it's account cancelling time, or you'll remember the things you enjoy about the game. Don't try to force playing out of obligation.
EDIT: Had to... go back... prevent knowledge of... Rule 9 at... source. God save us all.
Edited, Apr 1st 2037 12:12pm by RPZip
Edited, Dec 3rd 2007 2:46am by RPZip