How to win WHM and influence people :: World of Warcraft

#1 Jan 23 2004 at 4:40 PM Rating: Good

Scholar

518 posts

Had to write this..took me 10 min but kinda sums up how i feel sometimes:)

When you invite a whm make sure he is at least in another town or better yet farming for gil in the middle of nowhere. Make sure he isn’t high enough to cast teleport as this would ruin the fun of watching him run to a town or a craig to get a chocobo. Once he get the chocobo (make sure it is right after he spends gil on it) tell him you found another whm to fill the slot and you are sorry you don’t need him, but will keep him in mind in case a spot opens up. This makes sure the whm is still receptive to you, afterall he wasted time/gil on your party, but that makes it all better. Once he is out in the fields again tell him your party has a slot that just opened as someone had to log. Don’t worry they jump at the chance to group as they never get invites to parties.
Once he gets to where you are, tell him he is the main healer,backup healer,nuker, and in charge of every buff/debuff, even if you have a rdm or blm in the party. They have lots of mana and they love to use it, make sure they use up every single mp left before each fight ends, and complain if they don’t, say something like hey you didn’t banish enough! But don’t get too nice, make sure you complain about long downtime due to getting mana back. Also never ever ever invite a brd above 25, or rdm above 41 into your party given whm hate to feel weak by having another person use an effect that would give him mp back. This only makes them feel wimpy because they don’t have enough mana. Always when you get hit for 1 damage yell “CURE!” because sometimes those whm just don’t pay enough attention to health as all they ever want to do is melee and be a tank like you someday, and this will wake them up and remind them they can cure.
Never forget that a whm cant do anything but use cure spells though, the rest of their spells are just wastes of mana, and don’t forget to tell them this often. We all know Dia and paralyze do nothing so make sure they understand this, repeatably. There is nothing a whm wants to hear more than how to do their job, I mean they weren’t smart enough to be a tank so they had to pick something as weak as a whm right?
If your whm decides to raise someone else complain profusely about how he is taking up your time and that the dead body at your feet can wait for someone else to raise them as you know him casting that spell will make you sit for 4 more ticks. Whenever the whm casts stoneskin or blur, yell at them and make sure to tell them they will never get hurt as you can always hold hate, in fact get upset when they cast protectra and they get the protect effect. In addition whm never know when you lose protect or shell, make sure to have everyone say “Protect wore off.” As stated above whm never pay attention.
When the puller of the group comes back and the tank gets hurt make sure never to cast provoke, you know the whm only gets spamed when you provoke so the less you do this the better, I mean the whm cast all those silly spells on himself, let him take a few hits for the team once in a while, they got all those hp they never use, its like a meat shield for the meat shield, makes the party chain more, afterall the tank gets hurt less and the healer can just rest right? Make sure to yell though if he rest during battle, and never ever let him sit for more than 20 seconds ever, I mean they are lazy enough trying to rest all the time, what a bunch of loafers, but make sure to yell that the downtime is all because they cant conserve mp well and tell them you make a great level <x> warrior with your level 1 gear because you haven’t died yet this hour.They get great joy out of people telling them their job.
Never thank a whm for his healing esp if it saved your life as this would just inflate their egos, I mean everyone else praises them, and they hate it, just say something like “man why did you let my hp get so low after that 300 hit, why don’t you wake up?” they truly love this.
If your whm doesn’t have a certain spell make sure to point this out and complain loudly. Afterall whm can afford all spells right when they level, and don’t let them go buy one I they level, just complain they haven’t gotten it yet and have it in their inv to learn it right them. This works esp well with those cheap upper level spells (raise III 588k). Without these proddings they wont become the best whm and they will love you for this later on.

For ones not in party:
If you die and you don’t have a whm who can raise you in your party for some reason (probably because you didn’t follow this guide well), make sure to have every single person in your party ask for a raise from every single whm in any area, even if they are too low to cast raise yet, this makes sure at least one can come, as we all know whm are never to busy to run anywhere to give you a raise. Make sure you do this when you died right outside a town where you have hp, nothing a whm loves better than to give a raise to you, afterall isn’t that why they became a whm? Once you find one who says they will come, complain about how long they are taking to get there as this is wasting your exp time, then right before they get there, respawn and don’t tell them. Or better yet wait until another whm has raised you and when a second comes and asks where the dead person is, tell them oh we already got a raise, thanks though. You know whm loved to be thanked for everything and they wont mind the long trip, as that thanks you gave them is enough to make them smile.Trust me.
After a whm is there and casting raise, make sure to ask if they used Divine Seal, as we all very much know that DS+raise is just like a raise II.Turn down the raise and call for another one if they try to tell you anything different, because you as a melee fight know their spells more than they do, educate them, that’s what you are there for.They will love you for this later on.
If you are talking to a whm and they ask for a donation after the raise, just start telling them that if you did that you would make all whm pay for your vokes, as all whm know that warriors are called 2 zones over for a provoke, happens everyday. Afterall paying for a service from a whm, unthinkable, they are uber-rich jobs, and can afford whatever they want. They just need to be put in their place, trust me they love this.

(cutting off here as it is getting long, ask if you want more to this beautiful story)

How to win WHM and influence peopleFollow