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Other than gettin access to Stun, RDM/DRK is utterly useless.
RDM/DRK will also get the following Absorb Spells: CHR MND VIT INT AGI (No DEX and no STR). However these spell requires dark magic skill. RDM doe not have nearly as high dark magic skill as DRK. These spell will never stick when cast except on easy prey or lower mobs.
I've got word from a pair of 62+ that use my combination extensively report landing Absorb-MND 70%+ of the time on exp monsters despite the lower dark skill. I do not know how much truth there is to this yet as I'm not at that level to try it myself, but I feel I can take their word over yours because they've been using this combination for the vast majority of their exp gains and you clearly have not. On top of that about your post, I will not get Absorb-INT because dark knight gets that at 39.
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Don't bother use Souleater with DRK subbed. Your Souleater effectiveness is halved. Meaning you still lose 10% of your life per swing, but only will deal 50% bonus damage compared to a DRK as main job.
Dark knights do not get stoneskin to block out some of the Souleater damage done to them nor can they cure or regen themselves. Drain has a long recast time and does not fully make up for that. On top of that, they need to be more freugal in it's use due to the hate additional hate from the enhancement to their already hard hits. I do however know of it's uselessness on solo/farming monsters.
Overall, you've got nothing to say to me.
Sounds to me like you want to be a Melee.
If you are subbing DRK, and only get 50% of the actual attack bonus, and you want to be a (who knows why anyone would want to be a Melee RDM, they usualy just give mob more TP)melee RDM, sub WAR. You get a DEF and STR bonus, Double Attack, Berserk, Defender, and War Cry.
And as far as Emilyia not having anything to say to you, you did notice she playes a RDK, and a RDM, both of which are at a level much higher than you. That means she has experience in both jobs, and about 5X the experience you do.
Not to mention I got to party with her first hand, and she did an AWESOME job, I'd take her advice if I were you.
Then again, it is perfectly okay to go against the "Cookie Cutter" jobs.
So what if these "Cookie Cutter" jobs have been extensively tested to be the most beneficial to an EXP party, or to make your character more powerful over all.
I'm sure you can find some parties who are happy with 2 or 3K an hour EXP, who dont mind that when you Convert, you use up all your MP to heal yourself, just as long as you keep giving the mob TP, and ocasionaly refresh someone, you will still get groups.