someprotienguy wrote:
Ovaries though, come mid 30s they aren't what they used to be. That fertility rate plummets, you'll get labelled as a "high risk" pregnancy by the doctors. They'll want more tests, the chances of having a child with a birth defect or a miscarriage start really rising and...
You know what I'm going to shut up now.
That's my point. Although there are women that have children in their late 30's, early 40's, I want as normal of a pregnancy as possible and the longer I wait, the chances of that decrease significantly.
Torrence wrote:
I also wouldn't consider 3 years between you "younger". He's old enough to be out of college and in the world, old enough to realize that he's either going to settle down or continue to have his freedom, and let's not kid ourselves, that's what this is about. It's the same at 27 as it is at 40 (the age of my last partner when we met). If the commitment issue came up and it was a fight, that should have been a red flag no matter what his age is. You might love him, you might feel he loves you, but if you aren't at the same stage in life you will find that it's unfair to you both to try to "wait it out". You will resent him, especially if a few more years go by and he still hasn't moved forward with an engagement.
It's your life and the heart wants what the heart wants, but from a practical point of view, you should plan for the worst and decide whether being with him is worth the chance you may never be married nor have children. If it isn't, then maybe consider moving on.
Even though it is only a 3yr difference, it feels like we are worlds apart sometimes. He's still in school, works part-time, and is still in that "going out to party with my friends" mode. I was past that stage years ago. The fight about marriage wasn't so much about the topic itself, but more the way I reacted to his complete rejection when I brought the subject up. I don't take rejection very well and become quite defensive when my feelings are hurt. I know I will grow to resent him if he is holding me back from what I want in life and I really don't wanna go that route, but I fear the outcome if I become insistent about what I want. Either he will get tired of it and leave, or I will get tired of him dragging his feet and leave. Either option, I'm really not okay with.
Catwho wrote:
Any time I get baby cravings I go help take care of a friend's baby. I'm cured pretty quickly.
I think of them like puppies. They're cute, they're fun to play with, they're a mess and a long term commitment so while I enjoy seeing other people's kids/puppies, I do not wish to adopt one of my own.
That's what I usually do! A friend of mine has a 2yr old and a 3mo. I went over to her house this past weekend and it only intensified the feeling. I was holding the screaming 3mo while she was dealing with the screaming 2yr old and all I could do is smile and fantasize about having a little screaming bundle myself. That's when I knew I had it bad...
Edited, Feb 12th 2014 3:53pm by Delva