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Make sure you really enjoy that banana.Follow

#1 Nov 04 2013 at 6:20 PM Rating: Excellent
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Dozens of Deadly Spiders Burst from Banana As Woman Prepares to Eat It wrote:
An urban legend joined forces with a recurring nightmare and the worst case scenario to permanently traumatize a young mother who found dozens of the world's most venomous spiders crawling all over the banana she was preparing to consume.

"I thought it was mold," said Consi Taylor, 29, of London, referring to the white spots she found on her banana. "[B]ut when I had a closer look I saw some funny looking spots...and was horrified to see they were spiders. They were hatching out on the table, scurrying around on my carpet."

Before realizing she was dealing with dozens of Brazilian wandering spiders (AKA banana spiders) — a highly aggressive, highly venomous spider certified as "the most toxic" by Guinness World Records — Taylor attempted to return the bananas to the Sainsbury's supermarket where she'd bought them.

She was initially offered £10 ($16) for her trouble, but after sending a photo of the spider to a pest control specialist, Taylor, her husband Richard, and their two small children were ordered to get the hell out of the house and never look back.

Well, at least until the residence was thoroughly fumigated.

Sainsbury’s subsequently offered to pay the full cost of the extermination, as well as pick up the tab at the hotel where the Taylors were temporarily put up.

The supermarket chain apologized for the incident, but insisted it has "rigorous controls on imported products at all stages" which significantly reduce the instances of killer spiders bursting from bananas and attacking patrons.

Taylor, meanwhile, is content with reducing her daily intake of potassium.

"I hope I didn’t eat one but I can’t be sure," she said. "I now have a phobia of buying bananas. We don’t know whether they’ve all gone."


No pics cause this is too ****** up even for me.
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#2 Nov 04 2013 at 6:34 PM Rating: Excellent
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I was promised a thread with no pics! Smiley: mad

I would never buy another banana, ever.
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#3 Nov 04 2013 at 6:57 PM Rating: Excellent
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Well I warned my mother about this. She doesnt buy them all that often, but the nursing home gets a few cases of them in each week for the residents.

Now I know what her death is going to be. Thanks Obama.
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#4 Nov 04 2013 at 6:57 PM Rating: Excellent
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My brother is mega afraid of spiders and eats a banana a day.

Thank you for helping me ruin his life just a little more.
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#5 Nov 04 2013 at 9:04 PM Rating: Good
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Crap, I just bought some bananas today. ...um, I'll be back.
#6 Nov 04 2013 at 9:13 PM Rating: Excellent
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I always check mine for suspicious holes and place them in airtight quarentine for a period of time before I have my laser armed robot open them in a contained clas IV quarentine chamber with integrated heat vaporization technology.

So far no deadly spdiers in any of my banannas.

Brazillian wandering spiders are very large, and very agressive, so it is unusual for them to remain quiet long enough to get them in the bag.
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#7 Nov 04 2013 at 9:28 PM Rating: Good
I ******* hate bananas. Thanks for reassuring I should still hate them forever. 'cuz I hate spiders just as much.
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#8 Nov 04 2013 at 10:00 PM Rating: Good
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Dread Lörd Kaolian wrote:
Brazillian wandering spiders are very large, and very agressive, so it is unusual for them to remain quiet long enough to get them in the bag.


It wasn't a full grown spider in the bag, the bananas were coated with the eggs and the pickers never cleaned them off. Thank God we hose our fruits and vegetables down with a liberal application of pesticides and radiation here in the States. What kind of half *** food regulations do they have over there?
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#9 Nov 05 2013 at 6:15 AM Rating: Good
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I don't eat fruits/vegetables from exotic countries where freaky fruit spiders live.

Sometimes I buy an exotic fruit just to throw it out. Take that, spiders!
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#10 Nov 05 2013 at 6:28 AM Rating: Good
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I prefer spiders in my fruit to those irritating fruit flies and small birds.
#11 Nov 05 2013 at 2:58 PM Rating: Excellent
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Aripyanfar wrote:
I prefer spiders in my fruit to those irritating fruit flies and small birds.


Well you're used to spiders anyway, if you found a small bird inside your banana I bet you would freak the **** out just as much.
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#12 Nov 05 2013 at 4:21 PM Rating: Good
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Well so much for buying bananas ever again.
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#13 Nov 05 2013 at 4:40 PM Rating: Good
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Pawkeshup the Meaningless wrote:
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Well so much for buying bananas ever again.
Because one banana out of billions that is also thousands of miles away from you had spiders on it?
#14 Nov 05 2013 at 7:40 PM Rating: Excellent
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#15 Nov 05 2013 at 8:42 PM Rating: Good
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She should have noticed something was amiss when the banana tried to crawl up a wall and spin a web.
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#16 Nov 05 2013 at 10:00 PM Rating: Good
Just avoid bananas with white spots that look like mold.
#17 Nov 06 2013 at 4:30 PM Rating: Good
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#18 Nov 06 2013 at 5:29 PM Rating: Good
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Bought a cluster of bananas today. Threw 'em in a dumpster.

Potential spiders just got owned!
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#19 Nov 06 2013 at 5:39 PM Rating: Excellent
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Mazra wrote:
Bought a cluster of bananas today. Threw 'em in a dumpster.

Potential spiders just got owned!


Starving 3rd world people too! Let's not forget about them!
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#20 Nov 06 2013 at 6:02 PM Rating: Excellent
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Iamadam wrote:
Mazra wrote:
Bought a cluster of bananas today. Threw 'em in a dumpster.

Potential spiders just got owned!


Starving 3rd world people too! Let's not forget about them!


And the birds that get ambushed by the spiders at the dump.
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#21 Nov 07 2013 at 2:09 AM Rating: Decent
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I've known that spiders in the bananas is actually a real(but really unlikely) possibility since I was 7. I still ******' love bananas though.
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#22 Nov 07 2013 at 7:38 AM Rating: Good
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Iamadam wrote:
Mazra wrote:
Bought a cluster of bananas today. Threw 'em in a dumpster.

Potential spiders just got owned!


Starving 3rd world people too! Let's not forget about them!


I thought long and hard on this potential issue, and I came to the conclusion that had I not bought that cluster of bananas, the poor child slaves in Africa would not have gotten their daily ration of beans. Besides, it's not like I'd want to send a cluster of spider infested bananas to them, anyway - that would just be mean.
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#23 Nov 07 2013 at 2:30 PM Rating: Excellent
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I guess this raises the average micromort for eating banana's
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