I use Recount because it gives me a measure of my performance but for my own benefit only.
I use Auctionator because of the current habit of posting stackable items singly. For some it makes sense but if I want several stacks of something an addon makes it much simpler than individually approving each buy in the standard interface.
Neither of those is cheating anything.
When I raided I used DBM and it does make it easier but before it we used to - you know - talk to each other. One of the skills of a raid leader used to be briefing the troops. Now it seems to be watch the video, use dbm, answer ready check.
As for the gathering addons they are quite funny really. You can spot the people on their pre-planned route and shortcut them. Free will and a good memory will always be a lot more flexible than a semi-afk gatherer (and a lot better than a completely afk one which of course
is cheating - but I do love seeing the skeletons by the node locations
)
Having done much larger raids than 25 people with no addons, no voice comms, and worse graphics of course it can be done. But it would require re-learning old skills - and for many people they would be entirely new skills - like "
listening" .
Where I would have to hover on the edge of "cheating" is with ones like NPCScan. This is giving information which you maybe cannot see but has been fed to your client in case you look in the right direction. I'm sure that everyone who relies on it to spot their rares will be up in arms but it is a personal opinion.
Long ago I played with a healing add that basically put up a button for whoever needed a heal and even which heal and you just clicked it. It felt all wrong and I believe its been changed anyway.
Perhaps that is a difference between a game and a team sport. I don't enjoy clicking a button that has pre-made my choices for me - it is not a "good game" for me. But if team success is the prime objective and the addon is more efficient than I am then I can either step aside for someone who is better (or quite happy with the addon) or risk "letting the team down" by trying to soldier on without.
It is a social pressure and perhaps the argument is not really about cheating but yet again about "dumbing down".