Anyone know a Female Elvaan named Valkeshka, Dark Knight, but played by a guy irl? I've had the unfortunate experience of knowing this player almost since I began the game.
We became friends, except that I did not realize this player is an in-game predator. He lies to separate and isolate you from your friends, then claims he's interested in more. (I really and genuinely fell in the love with the guy...tho now I suspect the guy I fell in love with was all lies.)
Indeed, he became my in-game bf, except for those he didn't want to know this detail (meaning he's a player who hides that fact behind lies, lies, lies), dumped me at one point because one female player he's been obsessed with for a long time broke up with her in-game bf temporarily. Except what Valkeshka told me was that he was breaking up with me because of a new job in law enforcement he was taking on.
Worse, once we got back together, Valkeshka became both emotionally and verbally abusive and after reconciling with a friend, I had questions and found out by talking with a female friend that Valkeshka had said hated me, well, neither of us hated the other. So, Valkeshka played us both against each other and lied a lot.
So a warning out there for anyone who runs into Valkeshka: BEWARE and run the other way. Valkeshka has a toxic personality and especially will prey on women and any hang-ups they might have. Valkeshka is dangerous to your mental health. And for the record, I'm not the only female in-game who has experienced this...the guy has a pattern of preying on trusting female players.
P.S. And for the record, I dumped Valkeshka, not the other way around, once I woke up to his petty and spiteful games.
Also, this isn't the first time I was close to a guy in-game and ended it, but this is the first time I've felt the guy was dangerous enough to post a warning to others.
Edited, Sep 9th 2008 12:08pm by KenshinOro
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I would just like to say. Valk is actually a very nice individual. I'm Sorry you had to take this to the boards to heal your heartbreak.
Yukkari you don't need to publicly attack this guy.
Yukkari you don't need to publicly attack this guy.
How can you post a warning about a player who hasn't stolen anything, mpk'd anyone or ninja lotted something? You were in an ingame relationship and he messed you about. I'm sorry you got hurt but trying to ruin him isn't the way to get back at him.
Scholar
21 posts
Despite what others might believe, I did not post this comment out of revenge. Valkeshka comes across, yes, as a very nice person. But he has targeted several players in-game besides myself, lied and played manipulation games and that is why I posted this warning.
If it had just involved me, I would not have posted this, but I can personally name up to 4 other women in-game (Chuhchimama, Gummiebear, Waretaningyou, Sophieq) that i know he has messed with and a female player who has known Valkeshka in-game for years says that Valkeshka has done this to other female players, and they were so hurt they quit the game. I posted this as a warning to other female players so that they could protect themselves from a very good liar and player who only cares about himself.
As for Ryudoz, well, Ryudoz are you aware that Valkeshka tells everyone in-game that he hates your guts? Everyone but yourself. Not only that, but I see the very pattern happening with Sophieq that happened with me when I was in a relationship with Cracent. Valkeshka is befriending Sophieq, hinting subtly to her that you, Ryudoz are bad for her. If Sophieq should ever break up with you, Ryudoz, I promise you, Valkeshka will be right there saying, "I adore you and might be interested." Cause that's what happened with me.
So, Ryudoz, you might feel that Valkeshka is a very nice person, but are you really sure you know the true Valkeshka, or is it his lies that you know? And are you aware that Valkeshka got kicked from MF linkshell for his manipulation games with Gummiebear and Chuhchimama? (Btw,I found this out after the fact...Valkeshka swore to me that he left of his own free will.) Valkeshka is not all you think he is, and if you're not careful, you and Sophieq are going to be hurt by the guy.
Anyhow, for the record, I grew up with every kind of abuse I can imagine, posting this was not a method of taking revenge on Valkeshka, but warning other individuals about a very, very toxic and abusive individual. This guy told me so many lies that even the truth seemed foggy. A good many of these lies were to prevent me from finding out who else he was messing with or to isolate me from close in-game friends. I've started to unravel his lies, and in the process, realized just how dangerous an individual he is.
So for those who feel that I posted this out of revenge or to ruin Valkeshka, fine. But I know I did it as a way to warn and hopefully protect other female players.
The thing about abusers like Valkeshka is they have patterns and cycles that they repeat. What Valkeshka did to me, I have learned he has done with others in-game as well, and indeed I see him repeating the pattern with trusting individuals such a Ryudoz and Sophieq even now. It's because I know abusers abuse in cycles and patterns that I'm warning others as well.
And who says abusers can't have nice personalities? My dad has a nice personality and people like him as well...that didn't stop him from beating my half-brother at home though. So yes, Valkeshka might be very nice, I agree, but he's also an abuser. Many guys like him lure girls in with being nice, then slowly change behavior patterns, as Valkeshka did with me, slowly becoming more and more emotionally and verbally abusive as time passed.
And btw, if I was one to post a nasty revenge post, I would have done the same when I ended it with Cracent and started a relationship with Valkeshka. For the record, I didn't post a revenge post against Cracent, ever.
P.S. For the record, I don't hate Valkeshka. Hatred is an emotion that I rarely entertain because it's very self-destructive. In fact, I feel sorry for the guy. The one thing that Valkeshka always seemed obsessed with was the idea of others using him and ******** him over. What makes me sad is that Valkeshka has no idea that he's screwed himself over more than anyone else in-game, with this self-destructive behavior.
He's destroyed trust, lost friends due to this, including myself, and been kicked from linkshells and hurt lots of people, including himself. I really wish he'd wake up and see this, but he's still in denial, and I did once love the guy. I don't like to see him hurting himself this way.
But that also will not stop me from warning others about his being a danger. And he still is a dangerous individual that I don't want to see hurting others if I can perhaps put a stop to it.
Abusers like Valkeshka get away with their abuses because no one speaks up. I'm speaking up.
Edited, Sep 11th 2008 5:37am by KenshinOro
If it had just involved me, I would not have posted this, but I can personally name up to 4 other women in-game (Chuhchimama, Gummiebear, Waretaningyou, Sophieq) that i know he has messed with and a female player who has known Valkeshka in-game for years says that Valkeshka has done this to other female players, and they were so hurt they quit the game. I posted this as a warning to other female players so that they could protect themselves from a very good liar and player who only cares about himself.
As for Ryudoz, well, Ryudoz are you aware that Valkeshka tells everyone in-game that he hates your guts? Everyone but yourself. Not only that, but I see the very pattern happening with Sophieq that happened with me when I was in a relationship with Cracent. Valkeshka is befriending Sophieq, hinting subtly to her that you, Ryudoz are bad for her. If Sophieq should ever break up with you, Ryudoz, I promise you, Valkeshka will be right there saying, "I adore you and might be interested." Cause that's what happened with me.
So, Ryudoz, you might feel that Valkeshka is a very nice person, but are you really sure you know the true Valkeshka, or is it his lies that you know? And are you aware that Valkeshka got kicked from MF linkshell for his manipulation games with Gummiebear and Chuhchimama? (Btw,I found this out after the fact...Valkeshka swore to me that he left of his own free will.) Valkeshka is not all you think he is, and if you're not careful, you and Sophieq are going to be hurt by the guy.
Anyhow, for the record, I grew up with every kind of abuse I can imagine, posting this was not a method of taking revenge on Valkeshka, but warning other individuals about a very, very toxic and abusive individual. This guy told me so many lies that even the truth seemed foggy. A good many of these lies were to prevent me from finding out who else he was messing with or to isolate me from close in-game friends. I've started to unravel his lies, and in the process, realized just how dangerous an individual he is.
So for those who feel that I posted this out of revenge or to ruin Valkeshka, fine. But I know I did it as a way to warn and hopefully protect other female players.
The thing about abusers like Valkeshka is they have patterns and cycles that they repeat. What Valkeshka did to me, I have learned he has done with others in-game as well, and indeed I see him repeating the pattern with trusting individuals such a Ryudoz and Sophieq even now. It's because I know abusers abuse in cycles and patterns that I'm warning others as well.
And who says abusers can't have nice personalities? My dad has a nice personality and people like him as well...that didn't stop him from beating my half-brother at home though. So yes, Valkeshka might be very nice, I agree, but he's also an abuser. Many guys like him lure girls in with being nice, then slowly change behavior patterns, as Valkeshka did with me, slowly becoming more and more emotionally and verbally abusive as time passed.
And btw, if I was one to post a nasty revenge post, I would have done the same when I ended it with Cracent and started a relationship with Valkeshka. For the record, I didn't post a revenge post against Cracent, ever.
P.S. For the record, I don't hate Valkeshka. Hatred is an emotion that I rarely entertain because it's very self-destructive. In fact, I feel sorry for the guy. The one thing that Valkeshka always seemed obsessed with was the idea of others using him and ******** him over. What makes me sad is that Valkeshka has no idea that he's screwed himself over more than anyone else in-game, with this self-destructive behavior.
He's destroyed trust, lost friends due to this, including myself, and been kicked from linkshells and hurt lots of people, including himself. I really wish he'd wake up and see this, but he's still in denial, and I did once love the guy. I don't like to see him hurting himself this way.
But that also will not stop me from warning others about his being a danger. And he still is a dangerous individual that I don't want to see hurting others if I can perhaps put a stop to it.
Abusers like Valkeshka get away with their abuses because no one speaks up. I'm speaking up.
Edited, Sep 11th 2008 5:37am by KenshinOro
Quote:
Icegem: How can you post a warning about a player who hasn't stolen anything, mpk'd anyone or ninja lotted something? You were in an ingame relationship and he messed you about. I'm sorry you got hurt but trying to ruin him isn't the way to get back at him.
uhu, agree with that.
Topic starter, if i were you, well, i do, dont fall in love on someone in a game.
Best thing to do, act it, keeps the game fun for yourself, if the relation end your game isnt ruined.
It happen rarely (know some ppl for who it did work) that a relation in a game is serious but for the other 99% it keeps a game so not real life.
Edited, Sep 11th 2008 2:33pm by StormIvan
Scholar
21 posts
Actually, I was swearing off online relationships when Valkeshka, who'd I thought was my best friend in the game, convinced me to do otherwise. But, what you all are neglecting to see is that
1) I'm warning other females not so much because of what he did to me, but because I've seen him do so to numerous other female players in-game.
2) I'm moving on, but I'd hate to see another hurt by Valkeshka's lies and manipulation games. I could have gone into every detail about what he did and said, I'm not. But I care enough to not want to see others hurt by Valkeshka. Even my guy friends were hurt by Valkeshka, cause he made up lies and stories to create conflict between them and me. It doesn't just end with me and my involvement with Valkeshka, but involved so many more players that Valkeshka attacked and lied about as a way to get to me.
3) and by not speaking up about his bad behavior I would be enabling an abuser to continue to abuse. I refuse to do that. If I can save even one person from getting hurt, well, then all this is worth it.
Not gonna respond to any more postings about whether I'm taking revenge or not. I know I am not. For those who believe I am, well, that's your problem. I'm moving on now...
Edited, Sep 11th 2008 8:02am by KenshinOro
1) I'm warning other females not so much because of what he did to me, but because I've seen him do so to numerous other female players in-game.
2) I'm moving on, but I'd hate to see another hurt by Valkeshka's lies and manipulation games. I could have gone into every detail about what he did and said, I'm not. But I care enough to not want to see others hurt by Valkeshka. Even my guy friends were hurt by Valkeshka, cause he made up lies and stories to create conflict between them and me. It doesn't just end with me and my involvement with Valkeshka, but involved so many more players that Valkeshka attacked and lied about as a way to get to me.
3) and by not speaking up about his bad behavior I would be enabling an abuser to continue to abuse. I refuse to do that. If I can save even one person from getting hurt, well, then all this is worth it.
Not gonna respond to any more postings about whether I'm taking revenge or not. I know I am not. For those who believe I am, well, that's your problem. I'm moving on now...
Edited, Sep 11th 2008 8:02am by KenshinOro
Eventually he'll come across the wrong woman. Let's just hope he gets Meeq slapped.
Anyway, you have every right to warn people about a person like this. This is a social game and people will abuse that aspect. There is more to FFXI then just exp and gear.
Edited, Sep 11th 2008 9:02am by Tfgrunty
Anyway, you have every right to warn people about a person like this. This is a social game and people will abuse that aspect. There is more to FFXI then just exp and gear.
Edited, Sep 11th 2008 9:02am by Tfgrunty
Scholar
21 posts
Tfgrunty, thank you. Finally someone who understands. idk, I'm the kind who speaks up when others don't...maybe it's because I'm an introvert and social standing doesn't matter to me. So, tho others might not like what I have to say and call it revenge, I know otherwise. It is indeed a social game, and there are always going to be some who abuse that it seems. =/
Maybe you think warning all the women playing the game will stop him from manipulating them, but it won't. For a start you say he lies and manipulates women into believing him, don't you think he can find an answer to that or a way around it? Most abuser's are good at what they do sadly, it would seem he's had years of practice, so a thread on Alla won't really deter him. Thankyou for the warning though, I hope you find good friends in game.
Scholar
21 posts
No, I don't think he'll stop. But that doesn't mean I can't warn others, and it's why I'm warning others. Because the more who know that he's that way, I hope the fewer will fall prey to his games and lies. I know some will still, but I can only do what I can do. Not speaking up tho, would be far worse than speaking up, imo.
As for good friends, I've got tons of them, in spite of his trying to isolate me. I think that might have been why Valkeshka got so nasty and abusive towards the end, because in spite of his efforts, I kept making friends anyhow and out of concern for my friends, I even started up what I hope is a good ls. Valkeshka tried to control me and isolate, but I have this way of doing what I want to do anyhow lol. Plus, I guess I'm just hard to manipulate and control. =P
As for good friends, I've got tons of them, in spite of his trying to isolate me. I think that might have been why Valkeshka got so nasty and abusive towards the end, because in spite of his efforts, I kept making friends anyhow and out of concern for my friends, I even started up what I hope is a good ls. Valkeshka tried to control me and isolate, but I have this way of doing what I want to do anyhow lol. Plus, I guess I'm just hard to manipulate and control. =P
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