There are some films that are agonising and ecstatic.
Requiem For A Dream has riveting performances. Utterly devastating, but mesmerising to watch. I enjoyed it strangely while I watched it, and images from it still come to me occasionally.
I just watched the adult uncut version of Gia. There is more ecstasy in it than RFAD. Moments of deliciousness for the viewer and characters. The central portrait becomes more and more riveting. Someone once said sneeringly that all you have to do to win an Oscar is be prepared to cry and look ugly on film. But really, it's easier to see the range of an actor when they go through a wide range of experiences and emotions and states of health within the one narrative, the one film.
Kudos and thankyou to all who made it. I'm so glad I saw Gia.