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Bus, bus, bus, bus, goose!Follow

#1 Jun 19 2013 at 9:55 AM Rating: Excellent
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So you've managed to get the last seat on a very full bus, traveling to wherever it is someone like you would travel. The bus stops again and lets several more people on. At this point there are no empty seats and the newcomers all have to stand. Upon realizing this you feel a little hint of guilt (pretend you do, even if you don't) and decide an able-bodied individual like yourself (again, pretending here if necessary...) should give up their seat to one of these people. There are several people who have been left standing to choose from.

Who do you offer your seat to?
************ them it's my seat (I suck at pretending things)[/choice]
Parent with 2 toddlers:9 (28.1%)
Crazy attractive member of the opposite ***:3 (9.4%)
Elderly man:11 (34.4%)
10 year old wearing a knee brace:3 (9.4%)
Total:32
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#2 Jun 19 2013 at 10:02 AM Rating: Good
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How feeble is the elderly man?
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#3 Jun 19 2013 at 10:04 AM Rating: Excellent
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It's between the kid with the knee brace and the elderly man, depending on who looks to be in worse shape.
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#4 Jun 19 2013 at 10:05 AM Rating: Excellent
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Gray haired, wrinkled, definitely aged, but seems to walk okay for himself, maybe a little unsteady. Not the type that limps onto the bus and looks like he'll fall down at any second.
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#5 Jun 19 2013 at 10:08 AM Rating: Good
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Last option, considering that the buses in my area don't have enough room to play musical chairs once the bus is full.
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#6 Jun 19 2013 at 10:18 AM Rating: Good
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Where's the "I was already standing" option? I've never been on a bus that had empty seats.

I went with the parent because they're already in **** with the two midgets. The old man isn't going to die any slower, the kid probably did it to theirselves, and I'm not getting a blown for standing so they can all stand for all I care.
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#7 Jun 19 2013 at 10:24 AM Rating: Excellent
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lolgaxe wrote:
I'm not getting a blown for standing so they can all stand for all I care.

Well, not while she has to stand too. If she was sitting, however...
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#8 Jun 19 2013 at 10:28 AM Rating: Good
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Jophiel wrote:
lolgaxe wrote:
I'm not getting a blown for standing so they can all stand for all I care.

Well, not while she has to stand too. If she was sitting, however...
Yeah, scratch the kid....pedo is a no-no.

You might have better success with the old man as the mom would be sorely distracted.
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#9 Jun 19 2013 at 10:31 AM Rating: Excellent
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I'm pretty sure that's how the Japanese subway system works if all the anime I've watched is to be believed. Although they don't need to sit.
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#10 Jun 19 2013 at 10:33 AM Rating: Excellent
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What you need is space management. Allow the old man to sit, have the mom sit on his lap, stack the 10-year old and toddler on top. This should create enough floor space for you and the hot chick to lie down and have sticky bus floor ***.
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Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#11 Jun 19 2013 at 10:47 AM Rating: Good
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Elinda wrote:
Jophiel wrote:
lolgaxe wrote:
I'm not getting a blown for standing so they can all stand for all I care.

Well, not while she has to stand too. If she was sitting, however...
Yeah, scratch the kid....pedo is a no-no.

You might have better success with the old man as the mom would be sorely distracted.


You must have missed the "Crazy attractive member of the opposite ***" option in the poll.
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"We don't just borrow words; on occasion, English has pursued other languages down alleyways to beat them unconscious and rifle their pockets for new vocabulary."
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#12 Jun 19 2013 at 11:01 AM Rating: Good
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Shaowstrike the Shady wrote:

You must have missed the "Crazy attractive member of the opposite ***" option in the poll.
No but my version of a crazy attractive person would be standing very well (luv me good strong knees) so there'd be no reason to offer them a seat.


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#13 Jun 19 2013 at 11:11 AM Rating: Good
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Jophiel wrote:
What you need is space management. Allow the old man to sit, have the mom sit on his lap, stack the 10-year old and toddler on top. This should create enough floor space for you and the hot chick to lie down and have sticky bus floor ***.


Don't they disappear if you stack them sufficiently close?
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#14 Jun 19 2013 at 11:17 AM Rating: Excellent
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Elinda wrote:
Shaowstrike the Shady wrote:

You must have missed the "Crazy attractive member of the opposite ***" option in the poll.
No but my version of a crazy attractive person would be standing very well (luv me good strong knees) so there'd be no reason to offer them a seat.
Ironically enough that's the situation that prompted this thread. There's an all girls private high school and a university along my bus line, so there's regularly a good number of fairly attractive young women on the bus. The other day (seen this kind of thing a couple of times over the years) this guy (late 30s, early 40s aged) waits until an old lady had hobbled past him and offered his seat to this young gal in her early 20s, who promptly thanked him and sat down. I was standing a ways back quietly giving the guy a "what the ****?!" look (not that he noticed of course).

Thankfully someone else also took note later and offered the elderly lady a seat so all ended well, but still. Smiley: rolleyes
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#15 Jun 19 2013 at 11:20 AM Rating: Excellent
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I don't offer it to anyone. That would require actually talking to someone on a bus. I just stand up and let them have it out.
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#16 Jun 19 2013 at 11:23 AM Rating: Good
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someproteinguy wrote:
Elinda wrote:
Shaowstrike the Shady wrote:

You must have missed the "Crazy attractive member of the opposite ***" option in the poll.
No but my version of a crazy attractive person would be standing very well (luv me good strong knees) so there'd be no reason to offer them a seat.
Ironically enough that's the situation that prompted this thread. There's an all girls private high school and a university along my bus line, so there's regularly a good number of fairly attractive young women on the bus. The other day (seen this kind of thing a couple of times over the years) this guy (late 30s, early 40s aged) waits until an old lady had hobbled past him and offered his seat to this young gal in her early 20s, who promptly thanked him and sat down. I was standing a ways back quietly giving the guy a "what the ****?!" look (not that he noticed of course).

Thankfully someone else also took note later and offered the elderly lady a seat so all ended well, but still. Smiley: rolleyes

And what's funny (I almost said ironic but it's not irony) is that giving the 20something babe his seat is not going to get the guy a bj, a lay or even date.

Also, old people don't 'generally 'text' so they don't really need to sit down.
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#17 Jun 19 2013 at 11:24 AM Rating: Excellent
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Not that any 39 year old dude is getting nailed by a 20 year old over bus seat assignments anyway, but I'd like to think a young lady would be more impressed by giving up a seat for Baba Yaga than by giving it to her.

Maybe not. I blame the iPods and Twitters and Beyonces.
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#18 Jun 19 2013 at 11:25 AM Rating: Excellent
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trickybeck wrote:
I don't offer it to anyone.

He sells it.
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Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#19 Jun 19 2013 at 11:29 AM Rating: Good
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Jophiel wrote:
I blame the iPods and Twitters and Beyonces.
60% of people can't be blamed then.
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I think it’s the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.
#20 Jun 19 2013 at 11:35 AM Rating: Excellent
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Elinda wrote:
And what's funny (I almost said ironic but it's not irony) is that giving the 20something babe his seat is not going to get the guy a bj, a lay or even date.
Don't let him know that, this is his best shot. At least that's what I told myself during my passive aggressive indignation.Smiley: rolleyes

Edited, Jun 19th 2013 10:39am by someproteinguy
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#21 Jun 19 2013 at 11:50 AM Rating: Good
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An interesting tidbit, or at least a tidbit, in my childhood world we played Duck, Duck, Gray Duck. I'd never heard of Duck, Duck, Goose before moving out east.





Edited, Jun 19th 2013 7:51pm by Elinda
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#22 Jun 19 2013 at 12:45 PM Rating: Excellent
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So it was just a game of duck racism?
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Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#23 Jun 19 2013 at 12:50 PM Rating: Good
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Since I have a nice ID card that says I'm disable, I don't have to get up for anyone else. Best offer me your seat or I'm likely to fall down on top of you, if the bus stops suddenly.
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#24 Jun 19 2013 at 12:53 PM Rating: Excellent
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ElneClare wrote:
Since I have a nice ID card that says I'm disable, I don't have to get up for anyone else.

Save it for the hot girl, Rosa.
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Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#25 Jun 19 2013 at 12:54 PM Rating: Good
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I was standing a ways back quietly giving the guy a "what the ****?!" look (not that he noticed of course).

Say something next time, pussy. You and people like you who are quietly bothered by things but never say a fucking thing are the reason such things continue to fee your silent outrage. Grow a pair.

Edited, Jun 19th 2013 3:05pm by Smasharoo
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#26 Jun 19 2013 at 12:54 PM Rating: Good
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Jophiel wrote:
So it was just a game of duck racism?
Yes, the game was rigged. If you were a brown duck there was no way to win.
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