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It's Christmas Eve and I am here to pay my election debtFollow

#1 Dec 24 2012 at 1:49 PM Rating: Excellent
Sacrificial Lamb
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Sig is modified, thank you, tricky. It comes down next Christmas Eve.

And for my little Christmas gift to you, my fellow Asylumites, I give you this limmerick of our narcisstic Majesty eulogizing Senator Daniel Inouye at his funeral:

So here's to the mem'ry of Danny
(And my mother and sister and granny!)
We shall never forget
You were some sort of vet
And your service to me was uncanny

Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night (from Afghanistan)!

Totem
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Obama

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"Totem is the personification of whiskey soaked evil" --Annabelle

"You're special, pumpkin, but not speshuler than the 'Bama Black Snake" --AtomicFlea
#2 Dec 24 2012 at 1:51 PM Rating: Good
Sacrificial Lamb
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And I fail at good sig editting.
/sigh

Totem
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Obama

Winner of Last(tm) VIII!

Winner of the 2008 Allakhazam March Madness tourny

"Totem is the personification of whiskey soaked evil" --Annabelle

"You're special, pumpkin, but not speshuler than the 'Bama Black Snake" --AtomicFlea
#3 Dec 24 2012 at 1:57 PM Rating: Excellent
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Where's my fiddy dollahs?!?! Smiley: madSmiley: madSmiley: mad
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Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#4 Dec 24 2012 at 1:59 PM Rating: Excellent
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Jophiel wrote:
Where's my fiddy dollahs?!?! Smiley: madSmiley: madSmiley: mad
Varus PMed me and told me to tell you that he'd put your money in the mail with your magazines.
#5 Dec 24 2012 at 3:32 PM Rating: Good
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The One and Only Poldaran wrote:
Jophiel wrote:
Where's my fiddy dollahs?!?! Smiley: madSmiley: madSmiley: mad
Varus PMed me and told me to tell you that he'd put your money in the mail with your magazines.
Oh, well, it'll be there any day now.
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#6 Dec 24 2012 at 6:01 PM Rating: Decent
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Re: Totem's sig link, why is Obama still soliciting donations?
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we all know liberals are well adjusted american citizens who only want what's best for society. While conservatives are evil money grubbing scum who only want to sh*t on the little man and rob the world of its resources.
#7 Dec 24 2012 at 6:14 PM Rating: Good
Sacrificial Lamb
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Lol, because he's is dirty, narcisstic, tax increasing Democrat? And the Benjamins aren't just gonna jump in his wallet by themselves, you know!
;)

Totem
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Born-on date: 2076

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Obama

Winner of Last(tm) VIII!

Winner of the 2008 Allakhazam March Madness tourny

"Totem is the personification of whiskey soaked evil" --Annabelle

"You're special, pumpkin, but not speshuler than the 'Bama Black Snake" --AtomicFlea
#8 Dec 24 2012 at 10:57 PM Rating: Excellent
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It's Christmas Eve and I installed Minecraft on Hannah's computer (it's all she's talked about for about 6 months) and it ran poorly. It's normal to build her a new computer so it runs well and she's happy tomorrow, right? It's also normal to call and then drive to friends house to acquire orphaned hardware to do that? I mean, it's Christmas, right?
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To make a long story short, I don't take any responsibility for anything I post here. It's not news, it's not truth, it's not serious. It's parody. It's satire. It's bitter. It's angsty. Your mother's a *****. You like to jack off dogs. That's right, you heard me. You like to grab that dog by the bone and rub it like a ski pole. Your dad? ***. Your priest? Straight. **** off and let me post. It's not true, it's all in good fun. Now go away.

#9 Dec 24 2012 at 11:03 PM Rating: Excellent
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Smasharoo wrote:
It's Christmas Eve and I installed Minecraft on Hannah's computer (it's all she's talked about for about 6 months) and it ran poorly. It's normal to build her a new computer so it runs well and she's happy tomorrow, right? It's also normal to call and then drive to friends house to acquire orphaned hardware to do that? I mean, it's Christmas, right?

Dude, you are whipped.



/jealous
#10 Dec 24 2012 at 11:28 PM Rating: Excellent
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WTF Erector-Set computer is she on now that Minecraft runs slowly?
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Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#11 Dec 25 2012 at 12:37 AM Rating: Good
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You get props in my books for honoring an internet debt (unlike some **** waffles). I may not always agree with you, but I certainly respect you. Long live the 'Bama Black Snake!!
#12 Dec 25 2012 at 12:53 AM Rating: Excellent
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minecraft ran slow? Wow. I kinda want to see this computer now.
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#13 Dec 25 2012 at 2:05 AM Rating: Good
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It's likely a software issue, rather than a hardware one, although the easiest way to fix it is either to erase it or upgrade the hardware.
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#14 Dec 25 2012 at 3:11 AM Rating: Good
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Aripyanfar wrote:
It's likely a software issue, rather than a hardware one, although the easiest way to fix it is either to erase it or upgrade the hardware.


While that could be the case, I would suspect that Smash would be able to tell if it whether it was a software issue or hardware issue.
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#15 Dec 25 2012 at 11:28 AM Rating: Excellent
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Jophiel wrote:
WTF Erector-Set computer is she on now that Minecraft runs slowly?

#16 Dec 28 2012 at 7:40 AM Rating: Good
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Totem wrote:
Sig is modified, thank you, tricky. It comes down next Christmas Eve.

Totem

I'm disappointed. I thought Obama would be bigger.
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I lost my post
#17 Dec 30 2012 at 8:10 AM Rating: Good
Sacrificial Lamb
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<overwrought and heavy sigh>

Some people are never satisfied!

Totem
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Born-on date: 2076

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Obama

Winner of Last(tm) VIII!

Winner of the 2008 Allakhazam March Madness tourny

"Totem is the personification of whiskey soaked evil" --Annabelle

"You're special, pumpkin, but not speshuler than the 'Bama Black Snake" --AtomicFlea
#18 Dec 30 2012 at 8:14 AM Rating: Good
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Totem wrote:
<overwrought and heavy sigh>

Some people are never satisfied!

Totem


I think they make them Equine sized in novelty shops just for those people.
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#19 Dec 30 2012 at 5:50 PM Rating: Good
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TirithRR wrote:
Totem wrote:
<overwrought and heavy sigh>

Some people are never satisfied!

Totem


I think they make them Equine sized in novelty shops just for those people.


Here's a link for those interested.
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#20 Dec 30 2012 at 6:53 PM Rating: Good
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Dread Lörd Kaolian wrote:
minecraft ran slow? Wow. I kinda want to see this computer now.

She wanted "that fruit computer" and got a raspberry pi instead.
#21 Dec 30 2012 at 10:50 PM Rating: Excellent
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She wanted "that fruit computer" and got a raspberry pi instead.


It's actually an Arduino hooked up to a pineapple and an old shaving mirror. The keyboard is a Casio and the mouse is actually a cat toy. I throw leggos at her and yell "this is totally Minecraft!"
____________________________
Disclaimer:

To make a long story short, I don't take any responsibility for anything I post here. It's not news, it's not truth, it's not serious. It's parody. It's satire. It's bitter. It's angsty. Your mother's a *****. You like to jack off dogs. That's right, you heard me. You like to grab that dog by the bone and rub it like a ski pole. Your dad? ***. Your priest? Straight. **** off and let me post. It's not true, it's all in good fun. Now go away.

#22 Dec 31 2012 at 7:00 AM Rating: Excellent
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TILT
That sounds more entertaining than Minecraft.
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Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#23 Jan 23 2013 at 5:03 PM Rating: Good
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It never ceases to amaze me that video games seem to be going backwards. I own an after school program now (karate based of course) and super mario and minecraft are the games of choice. I guess it is like we hit the 999,999 score and now have to go back to the beginning.
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#24 Jan 23 2013 at 5:21 PM Rating: Excellent
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Maybe your kids just own outdated systems. Around these parts the kids are all about the Call of Duty and Battlefield franchises. Bang bang bang...
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Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#25 Jan 23 2013 at 5:39 PM Rating: Good
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We have our share of that too... kindergarten kids that talk about black ops... Parents don't pay attention to what they are playing.

Meanwhile, my parents would not let me listen to KISS growing up because they thought it was satanic. Imagine my surprise as an adult when I actually listened to their songs...
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I voted for the other guy.
#26 Jan 23 2013 at 5:40 PM Rating: Excellent
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Ah, I thought you were talking older children. I don't know of any kindergarten aged kids playing Black Ops although I'm sure they're out there. I mainly just don't hang out with kindergarten aged kids (yet... give my little one a few more years).
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Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
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