Forum Settings
       
Reply To Thread

It's Christmas Eve and I am here to pay my election debtFollow

#1 Dec 24 2012 at 1:49 PM Rating: Excellent
Sacrificial Lamb
*****
16,110 posts
Sig is modified, thank you, tricky. It comes down next Christmas Eve.

And for my little Christmas gift to you, my fellow Asylumites, I give you this limmerick of our narcisstic Majesty eulogizing Senator Daniel Inouye at his funeral:

So here's to the mem'ry of Danny
(And my mother and sister and granny!)
We shall never forget
You were some sort of vet
And your service to me was uncanny

Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night (from Afghanistan)!

Totem
____________________________
Born-on date: 2076

Zombo.com

Obama

Winner of Last(tm) VIII!

Winner of the 2008 Allakhazam March Madness tourny

"Totem is the personification of whiskey soaked evil" --Annabelle

"You're special, pumpkin, but not speshuler than the 'Bama Black Snake" --AtomicFlea
#2 Dec 24 2012 at 1:51 PM Rating: Good
Sacrificial Lamb
*****
16,110 posts
And I fail at good sig editting.
/sigh

Totem
____________________________
Born-on date: 2076

Zombo.com

Obama

Winner of Last(tm) VIII!

Winner of the 2008 Allakhazam March Madness tourny

"Totem is the personification of whiskey soaked evil" --Annabelle

"You're special, pumpkin, but not speshuler than the 'Bama Black Snake" --AtomicFlea
#3 Dec 24 2012 at 1:57 PM Rating: Excellent
Liberal Conspiracy
*******
TILT
Where's my fiddy dollahs?!?! Smiley: madSmiley: madSmiley: mad
____________________________
Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#4 Dec 24 2012 at 1:59 PM Rating: Excellent
Avatar
******
27,416 posts
Jophiel wrote:
Where's my fiddy dollahs?!?! Smiley: madSmiley: madSmiley: mad
Varus PMed me and told me to tell you that he'd put your money in the mail with your magazines.
____________________________
Someone on another forum wrote:
Wow, you've got an awesome writing style.! I really dig the narrator's back story, humor, sarcasm, and the plethora of pop culture references. Altogether a refreshingly different RotR journal (not that I don't like the more traditional ones, mind you).

#5 Dec 24 2012 at 3:32 PM Rating: Good
Avatar
******
27,194 posts
The One and Only Poldaran wrote:
Jophiel wrote:
Where's my fiddy dollahs?!?! Smiley: madSmiley: madSmiley: mad
Varus PMed me and told me to tell you that he'd put your money in the mail with your magazines.
Oh, well, it'll be there any day now.
____________________________
Theophany wrote:
YOU'RE AN ELITIST @#%^ AETHIEN, NO WONDER YOU HAVE NO FRIENDS AND PEOPLE HATE YOU.
someproteinguy wrote:
Aethien you take more terrible pictures than a Japanese tourist.
Astarin wrote:
One day, Maz, you'll learn not to click on anything Aeth links.
#6 Dec 24 2012 at 6:01 PM Rating: Decent
Prodigal Son
*****
19,924 posts
Re: Totem's sig link, why is Obama still soliciting donations?
____________________________
publiusvarus wrote:
we all know liberals are well adjusted american citizens who only want what's best for society. While conservatives are evil money grubbing scum who only want to sh*t on the little man and rob the world of its resources.
#7 Dec 24 2012 at 6:14 PM Rating: Good
Sacrificial Lamb
*****
16,110 posts
Lol, because he's is dirty, narcisstic, tax increasing Democrat? And the Benjamins aren't just gonna jump in his wallet by themselves, you know!
;)

Totem
____________________________
Born-on date: 2076

Zombo.com

Obama

Winner of Last(tm) VIII!

Winner of the 2008 Allakhazam March Madness tourny

"Totem is the personification of whiskey soaked evil" --Annabelle

"You're special, pumpkin, but not speshuler than the 'Bama Black Snake" --AtomicFlea
#8 Dec 24 2012 at 10:57 PM Rating: Excellent
Lunatic
******
29,301 posts
It's Christmas Eve and I installed Minecraft on Hannah's computer (it's all she's talked about for about 6 months) and it ran poorly. It's normal to build her a new computer so it runs well and she's happy tomorrow, right? It's also normal to call and then drive to friends house to acquire orphaned hardware to do that? I mean, it's Christmas, right?
____________________________
Disclaimer:

To make a long story short, I don't take any responsibility for anything I post here. It's not news, it's not truth, it's not serious. It's parody. It's satire. It's bitter. It's angsty. Your mother's a whore. You like to jack off dogs. That's right, you heard me. You like to grab that dog by the bone and rub it like a ski pole. Your dad? Gay. Your priest? Straight. **** off and let me post. It's not true, it's all in good fun. Now go away.

#9 Dec 24 2012 at 11:03 PM Rating: Excellent
I Hacked This Title
*****
13,880 posts
Smasharoo wrote:
It's Christmas Eve and I installed Minecraft on Hannah's computer (it's all she's talked about for about 6 months) and it ran poorly. It's normal to build her a new computer so it runs well and she's happy tomorrow, right? It's also normal to call and then drive to friends house to acquire orphaned hardware to do that? I mean, it's Christmas, right?

Dude, you are whipped.



/jealous
#10 Dec 24 2012 at 11:28 PM Rating: Excellent
Liberal Conspiracy
*******
TILT
WTF Erector-Set computer is she on now that Minecraft runs slowly?
____________________________
Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#11 Dec 25 2012 at 12:37 AM Rating: Good
@#%^ing DRK
*****
13,137 posts
You get props in my books for honoring an internet debt (unlike some **** waffles). I may not always agree with you, but I certainly respect you. Long live the 'Bama Black Snake!!
#12 Dec 25 2012 at 12:53 AM Rating: Excellent
Avatar
******
29,875 posts
minecraft ran slow? Wow. I kinda want to see this computer now.
____________________________
Arch Duke Kaolian Drachensborn, lvl 95 Ranger, Unrest Server
Tech support forum | FAQ (Support) | Mobile Zam: http://m.zam.com (Premium only)
Forum Rules
#13 Dec 25 2012 at 2:05 AM Rating: Good
Everyone's Oiran
Avatar
*****
15,917 posts
It's likely a software issue, rather than a hardware one, although the easiest way to fix it is either to erase it or upgrade the hardware.
____________________________
<3

http://www.reddit.com/r/Forum4/
#14 Dec 25 2012 at 3:11 AM Rating: Good
Avatar
*****
11,952 posts
Aripyanfar wrote:
It's likely a software issue, rather than a hardware one, although the easiest way to fix it is either to erase it or upgrade the hardware.


While that could be the case, I would suspect that Smash would be able to tell if it whether it was a software issue or hardware issue.
____________________________
"India black magic anal sex zionist blow job terrorism child rape bicycle"
Just as Planned.
#15 Dec 25 2012 at 11:28 AM Rating: Excellent
Gurue
*****
16,288 posts
Jophiel wrote:
WTF Erector-Set computer is she on now that Minecraft runs slowly?

#16 Dec 28 2012 at 7:40 AM Rating: Good
Skelly Poker Since 2008
*****
15,830 posts
Totem wrote:
Sig is modified, thank you, tricky. It comes down next Christmas Eve.

Totem

I'm disappointed. I thought Obama would be bigger.
____________________________
Alma wrote:
Post and be happy!
#17 Dec 30 2012 at 8:10 AM Rating: Good
Sacrificial Lamb
*****
16,110 posts
<overwrought and heavy sigh>

Some people are never satisfied!

Totem
____________________________
Born-on date: 2076

Zombo.com

Obama

Winner of Last(tm) VIII!

Winner of the 2008 Allakhazam March Madness tourny

"Totem is the personification of whiskey soaked evil" --Annabelle

"You're special, pumpkin, but not speshuler than the 'Bama Black Snake" --AtomicFlea
#18 Dec 30 2012 at 8:14 AM Rating: Good
Worst. Title. Ever!
*****
14,800 posts
Totem wrote:
<overwrought and heavy sigh>

Some people are never satisfied!

Totem


I think they make them Equine sized in novelty shops just for those people.
____________________________
Can't sleep, clown will eat me.
#19 Dec 30 2012 at 5:50 PM Rating: Good
Avatar
*****
11,952 posts
TirithRR wrote:
Totem wrote:
<overwrought and heavy sigh>

Some people are never satisfied!

Totem


I think they make them Equine sized in novelty shops just for those people.


Here's a link for those interested.
____________________________
"India black magic anal sex zionist blow job terrorism child rape bicycle"
Just as Planned.
#20 Dec 30 2012 at 6:53 PM Rating: Good
Repressed Memories
******
20,575 posts
Dread Lörd Kaolian wrote:
minecraft ran slow? Wow. I kinda want to see this computer now.

She wanted "that fruit computer" and got a raspberry pi instead.
#21 Dec 30 2012 at 10:50 PM Rating: Excellent
Lunatic
******
29,301 posts

She wanted "that fruit computer" and got a raspberry pi instead.


It's actually an Arduino hooked up to a pineapple and an old shaving mirror. The keyboard is a Casio and the mouse is actually a cat toy. I throw leggos at her and yell "this is totally Minecraft!"
____________________________
Disclaimer:

To make a long story short, I don't take any responsibility for anything I post here. It's not news, it's not truth, it's not serious. It's parody. It's satire. It's bitter. It's angsty. Your mother's a whore. You like to jack off dogs. That's right, you heard me. You like to grab that dog by the bone and rub it like a ski pole. Your dad? Gay. Your priest? Straight. **** off and let me post. It's not true, it's all in good fun. Now go away.

#22 Dec 31 2012 at 7:00 AM Rating: Excellent
Liberal Conspiracy
*******
TILT
That sounds more entertaining than Minecraft.
____________________________
Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#23 Jan 23 2013 at 5:03 PM Rating: Good
****
4,388 posts
It never ceases to amaze me that video games seem to be going backwards. I own an after school program now (karate based of course) and super mario and minecraft are the games of choice. I guess it is like we hit the 999,999 score and now have to go back to the beginning.
____________________________
I voted for the other guy.
#24 Jan 23 2013 at 5:21 PM Rating: Excellent
Liberal Conspiracy
*******
TILT
Maybe your kids just own outdated systems. Around these parts the kids are all about the Call of Duty and Battlefield franchises. Bang bang bang...
____________________________
Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#25 Jan 23 2013 at 5:39 PM Rating: Good
****
4,388 posts
We have our share of that too... kindergarten kids that talk about black ops... Parents don't pay attention to what they are playing.

Meanwhile, my parents would not let me listen to KISS growing up because they thought it was satanic. Imagine my surprise as an adult when I actually listened to their songs...
____________________________
I voted for the other guy.
#26 Jan 23 2013 at 5:40 PM Rating: Excellent
Liberal Conspiracy
*******
TILT
Ah, I thought you were talking older children. I don't know of any kindergarten aged kids playing Black Ops although I'm sure they're out there. I mainly just don't hang out with kindergarten aged kids (yet... give my little one a few more years).
____________________________
Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#27 Jan 23 2013 at 6:01 PM Rating: Good
Worst. Title. Ever!
*****
14,800 posts
I was talking to an old friend from High School and she was saying her mother bought the CoD games for her 9 year old brother, and she was thinking of picking up Black Ops II for him as a Christmas Gift.

I knew how she was, and had to warn her of the less than wholesome nature of the games, and the very graphic language of online multiplayer. Me and another freind's Husband who both played CoD quite a bit convinced her to not get it for him. Sure, if the mother wanted to eventually, more power to her. But my friend didn't want to contribute to exposing her younger brother to that type of thing. She didn't know exactly what those games were until we had told her.

Edited, Jan 23rd 2013 7:02pm by TirithRR
____________________________
Can't sleep, clown will eat me.
#28 Jan 23 2013 at 6:37 PM Rating: Excellent
Gurue
*****
16,288 posts
Eh, my son's been playing the CoD games since he was around 7. He's almost 11 now. We just explain to him what the deal is and he's always been ok. No nightmares, no agressive behavior, no swearing. And he still prefers swords to guns to play with. And in addition to those games he plays Skyrim, Minecraft and whatever MMO is my current flavor.
#29 Jan 23 2013 at 8:20 PM Rating: Excellent
***
1,877 posts
The difference between your son and the average 12 year old CoD player is that you are being a parent. You are showing an interest in what your child is doing in their free time instead of "Keep it down, I am trying to guess which direction these cars are going to turn in this NASCAR race".

Edited, Jan 23rd 2013 9:20pm by Criminy
____________________________
#swaggerjacker
#30 Jan 25 2013 at 10:16 PM Rating: Good
****
4,388 posts
How many do you have now Jophiel? Tacosid Jr. is now 3 and a half.
____________________________
I voted for the other guy.
#31 Jan 25 2013 at 10:18 PM Rating: Excellent
Liberal Conspiracy
*******
TILT
Two. Eldest is 13 and the little one turned two in October. Just as the one was mainly self-sufficient we decided we needed to do it all over again Smiley: dubious
____________________________
Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#32 Jan 25 2013 at 11:39 PM Rating: Good
Tracer Bullet
*****
12,564 posts
Jophiel wrote:
Eldest is 13

Ugh, that's really upsetting. Tell him to slow the fuck down.

____________________________
Na Zdrowie
#33 Jan 26 2013 at 7:13 AM Rating: Good
****
4,388 posts
11 years? Geez.

Of course might end up being the same on this end. Tacosid Jr.'s mom went psychotic in the past five years and we divorced. At the core of it, we had religious differences. I am a practicing christian, and she is the anti-christ. It could never work out once I found out.

I am getting remarried this May to a newer model. Kids could come farther down the road with that in mind.
____________________________
I voted for the other guy.
#34 Jan 26 2013 at 10:22 AM Rating: Good
****
6,753 posts
Hell, just make the older one take care of the younger one. Then you and Flea could go out of town for the weekend.

And congrats Taco. May your newer model always be as sane as she is right now.

Probably not, but one can dream.
____________________________
Some people are like slinkies, they aren't really good for anything, but they still bring a smile to your face when you push them down the stairs.
#35 Jan 26 2013 at 10:39 AM Rating: Decent
Lunatic
******
29,301 posts

I knew how she was, and had to warn her of the less than wholesome nature of the games, and the very graphic language of online multiplayer. Me and another freind's Husband who both played CoD quite a bit convinced her to not get it for him.


Wow. What an amazing busybody killjoy you are. Maybe when the kids old enough to start **** you and your husbands friend can come tell the kid he should wait a few years. If you think you shielded a nine year old boy from something with your actions you're a fucking gullible fool. All you did was open up more time for the kid to go light fires and torture small animals. Nine year old boys are learning violence, nothing you do will channel that somewhere else.

Well, I suppose you could let them pay a harmless video game so they don't hurt themselves or other people, but not if you were self righteous over involved **** who made everyone else's parenting her problem.

Edited, Jan 26th 2013 11:39am by Smasharoo
____________________________
Disclaimer:

To make a long story short, I don't take any responsibility for anything I post here. It's not news, it's not truth, it's not serious. It's parody. It's satire. It's bitter. It's angsty. Your mother's a whore. You like to jack off dogs. That's right, you heard me. You like to grab that dog by the bone and rub it like a ski pole. Your dad? Gay. Your priest? Straight. **** off and let me post. It's not true, it's all in good fun. Now go away.

#36 Jan 26 2013 at 12:21 PM Rating: Good
Worst. Title. Ever!
*****
14,800 posts
Nice of you to leave out the next line.

Quote:
Sure, if the mother wanted to eventually, more power to her. But my friend didn't want to contribute to exposing her younger brother to that type of thing.


We knew her, she didn't know the games. Again, if the boy wanted to play the games and his mother wanted to buy them for him, more power to them. But I don't see how informing his older sister what the games were really like and her deciding that she didn't want to get it for her brother makes ME the killjoy.
____________________________
Can't sleep, clown will eat me.
#37 Jan 26 2013 at 12:32 PM Rating: Good
Supreme Lionator
*****
14,174 posts
Whenever people talk about their partners going crazy, I make a mental note: being around this person for prolonged periods of time drives you insane.

Quote:
very graphic language of online multiplayer.


Yeah, because nine year olds play it.
____________________________
“Socialism never took root in America because the poor see themselves not as an exploited proletariat but as temporarily embarrassed millionaires.”
#38 Jan 26 2013 at 6:17 PM Rating: Excellent
Will swallow your soul
******
28,223 posts
Quote:
And congrats Taco. May your newer model always be as sane as she is right now.

Probably not, but one can dream.


What a boring fUCking life that would be.

____________________________
In a time of universal deceit, telling the truth is a revolutionary act.

#39 Jan 26 2013 at 9:10 PM Rating: Excellent
***
1,877 posts
Kavekk wrote:

Quote:
very graphic language of online multiplayer.


Yeah, because people with a nine year olds mentality play it.


FIFY
____________________________
#swaggerjacker
#40 Jan 27 2013 at 5:54 PM Rating: Good
Avatar
*****
11,952 posts
Jophiel wrote:
Ah, I thought you were talking older children. I don't know of any kindergarten aged kids playing Black Ops although I'm sure they're out there. I mainly just don't hang out with kindergarten aged kids (yet... give my little one a few more years).


Black ops/ COD is apparently more popular with young kids than teenagers.
____________________________
"India black magic anal sex zionist blow job terrorism child rape bicycle"
Just as Planned.
#41 Jan 27 2013 at 6:27 PM Rating: Excellent
Unforkgettable
*****
13,240 posts
It seems to be exceptionally popular with people who have had **** with my mom.
____________________________
Banh
#42 Jan 27 2013 at 6:37 PM Rating: Good
Worst. Title. Ever!
*****
14,800 posts
Spoonless wrote:
It seems to be exceptionally popular with people who have had **** with my mom.


That's not saying much though. Like saying that 100% of murderers have drank water in their lifetime.

Edited, Jan 27th 2013 7:37pm by TirithRR
____________________________
Can't sleep, clown will eat me.
#43 Jan 28 2013 at 12:47 AM Rating: Good
****
6,753 posts
Spoonless wrote:
It seems to be exceptionally popular with people who have had **** with my mom.


Apparently there are a lot of homosexuals and people of color. I get mistaken for them a lot.
____________________________
Some people are like slinkies, they aren't really good for anything, but they still bring a smile to your face when you push them down the stairs.
#44 Jan 28 2013 at 2:55 AM Rating: Good
Everyone's Oiran
Avatar
*****
15,917 posts
Timelordwho wrote:
Jophiel wrote:
Ah, I thought you were talking older children. I don't know of any kindergarten aged kids playing Black Ops although I'm sure they're out there. I mainly just don't hang out with kindergarten aged kids (yet... give my little one a few more years).


Black ops/ COD is apparently more popular with young kids than teenagers.

The teenagers have discovered there's something more than "wtf?" to all the free porn.
____________________________
<3

http://www.reddit.com/r/Forum4/
#45 Jan 28 2013 at 8:49 AM Rating: Good
******
43,650 posts
Spoonless wrote:
It seems to be exceptionally popular with people who have had **** with my mom.
I knew I should have gotten the Collector's Edition.
____________________________
George Carlin wrote:
I think it’s the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.
#46 Jan 30 2013 at 6:21 PM Rating: Good
****
4,388 posts
Samira:

So far so good...

Being single after 10 years of marriage was weird though.
____________________________
I voted for the other guy.
#47 Jan 30 2013 at 7:09 PM Rating: Good
Supreme Lionator
*****
14,174 posts
Samira wrote:
Quote:
And congrats Taco. May your newer model always be as sane as she is right now.

Probably not, but one can dream.


What a boring fUCking life that would be.


**** I only just got this pun.

Genius.
____________________________
“Socialism never took root in America because the poor see themselves not as an exploited proletariat but as temporarily embarrassed millionaires.”
Reply To Thread

Colors Smileys Quote OriginalQuote Checked Help

 

Recent Visitors: 23 All times are in CDT
RavennofTitan, TirithRR, Anonymous Guests (21)