I was going to say something witty and scathing, but people like that woman just drain the fire right out of me.
Let's be honest, though. The reality is that "witty and scathing" would likely escape you even if the fire were plentiful.
I mean, witty, on occasion, is likely within your grasp. Scathing is probably even something you could conjure up if the situation required. But mixing the two together in a cohesive and effective fashion is just slightly beyond your ken.
I had a very witty signature once, but apparently it offended the sensibilities of some of the frailer constitutions that frequent this particular internet message board.
[The rest of this message has been censored and I can't tell you what I actually think of you]