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#127 Dec 12 2011 at 1:54 PM Rating: Good
I consider myself to be masochistic, and I'm not really sure why I am the way I am in that regard. From speaking to the folks in my BDSM community, I think it's at least in part hereditary. One of my friends has a sub whose children (they are 8 and 10) love to be tied up. Another lady I know loves to tell the story of the time she found her 5 year old son straddling the bath tub and jumping up and down crushing his nether-bits and giggling. I'm adopted, so I have no idea whether or not my tastes for BDSM are hereditary or not, but I think it's an interesting concept.

That said, I had a blissfully happy childhood, aside from being teased at school. The only really bad thing that has happened in my life is my dad died of brain cancer when I was 18. I've dealt with depression on and off since that happened, close to 10 years ago. I don't recall showing any leanings towards BDSM as a child, but my memory is also crap. I first became interested in kink when I was in my early 20's, but didn't find a partner who was into it until a couple years ago.

I like to think of myself as a moderate kinkster. I like knife play, as long as it doesn't break skin. I like scratches, hair pulling, spankings, flogging as long as it's with a stingy flogger as opposed to a thuddy one. I also like light choking. I enjoy feeling the restriction of my breathing, but not having it gone completely. I find the surrender especially intoxicating. Trusting the person I'm with to take care of me, and not harm me while hurting me is just an indescribable feeling. Having them physically lead me to do things to them, or being tied up and letting them do whatever they want to me is just awesome. Candle wax is fun too, but honestly that just tickles more than anything else.

If my kinks make me screwed up in the head, so be it. I will say this though. Becoming a part of my local community has helped me out in so many ways besides just giving me an outlet to explore kink. It has increased my self confidence and my comfort in my own skin. It has also helped me make a bunch of new friends over the last two years, that are just truly awesome people. Also, in my community at least, there is a huge overlap between kinky, geeky and polyamorous folks. It's amazing.
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#128 Dec 12 2011 at 2:03 PM Rating: Excellent
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Wonder Gem PigtailsOfDoom wrote:
I consider myself to be masochistic, and I'm not really sure why I am the way I am in that regard.

Daddy issues.

Quote:
I'm adopted [...] The only really bad thing that has happened in my life is my dad died of brain cancer when I was 18.

Check it out. Even a broken clock, huh?
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Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#129 Dec 12 2011 at 3:08 PM Rating: Good
I thought the term was broken record? Smiley: tongue
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Popina, 100 Priest
Thelesis, 91 Mage
Necralita, 90 DK
Digits, 87 Shaman
Willowmei, 85 Druid
Shrika, 72 Warlock
Jaquelle, 54 Paladin
Grakine, 32 Hunter
The MMO-Zam's FB group. Please message me first so I know who you are.
#130 Dec 12 2011 at 4:55 PM Rating: Decent
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idiggory, King of Bards wrote:
That's her point. She is asserting that, while the practice of BDSM is generally hedonistic, we have no reason to assume that the kind of meditative trance described here is actually just a state of extreme pleasure. If she's describing it as a meditative trance akin to enlightenment, it's far more likely that it's a state of emotionless peace.


Yeah, it's probably the prey response. Your body floods with endorphins, you freeze up, the jaguar eats you while the other peccaries leg it. It's a very calm state, but it's brought on by pain and pleasure, not by understanding. Even if you think trancing in such a way is a way you might reach enlightenment, it is not enlightenment itself. It's not an enlightened state, it's not a similar experience.

Quote:
Tricking your body into doping itself up might feel great, but it's pretty much the opposite of the buddhist concept of enlightenment.


Your position is absurd.

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I disagree completely.

For one, Buddha spent years using pain in meditation, experiencing everything from starvation to sitting in thorn bushes. It was an extremely important part of his own path to enlightenment.

Plus, he believed that there was no set path to Nirvana. Polishing the sandals of monks would work for some. For others, enlightenment required deep use of chanting. Others used pain to force their mind to forget the present.

Yeah, HEDONISM as a doctrine is incompatible with Buddhism, since Buddhism holds that pain and pleasure are illusions. But pain experiences in BDSM scenarios are certainly capable of elevating someone into a state of meditation akin to something a practitioner of Buddhism might experience. But Hedonistic practices certainly can be.

They weren't talking about states of ecstasy, they were talking about meditative trances.


This post is incredibly incoherent.
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#131 Dec 12 2011 at 5:54 PM Rating: Excellent
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Delva wrote:
When I was a teenager, I did self-mutilate and even went to the extent of being hospitalized for it. This was before the medication and therapy because my parents did not deem it a necessity for me. Now that I am a grown woman and have a say so in my physiological well-being, I am on meds and do go to regular therapy. I have found a more constructive way to deal with stress rather than self-mutilation. I have not cut myself or harmed myself in any way in a little over 9yrs because I found the BDSM scene. My therapist does not agree with the extent I go to sometimes but he has noticed a distinct difference since I have joined the community. We have talked at length about my preferences in the bedroom and he has theorized that I have an Endorphin addiction. Basically, an adrenaline junkie.
Chemically, our bodies react to pain the same way. Pain receptors in the brain light up and the brain send out Endorphins which are the bodies natural pain killers. Endorphins also make you happy or euphoric the more your brain sends out. Some people can get a paper cut and are flooded with Endorphins but people with a higher pain tolerance, like myself, have to go through more pain in order for the brain to release said Endorphins. I can take a lot of damage and it doesn't hurt. I can get tattoo's and piercings and not be in the slightest bit of pain.
My therapist does keep a close eye on my physical well-being and has said if he felt I was going to far with the S/M play, he would have to step in. Like I said, it has been 9yrs and he hasn't had to pull the plug yet.


Interesting. Thanks for the post, it helps me understand a little better. And now I'm less worried about you. Smiley: lol Hope you and your new guy have fun!
#132Kelvyquayo, Posted: Dec 12 2011 at 6:39 PM, Rating: Sub-Default, (Expand Post) Do the people deny that the OP has some emotional issues which would be good to overcome? No, you just love the opportunity to spit venom a that which is different.
#133 Dec 12 2011 at 7:02 PM Rating: Excellent
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Kelvyquayo wrote:
.
Do you people deny that when a person dives into NON-vanilla *** that it is difficult to go back to regular ***?

Why the fuck do you care? You're not having *** with them.

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Iamadam the Prophet wrote:

You know that feeling you get when you have a little bit of hope, only to have it ripped away? Sweetums feeds on that.
#134 Dec 12 2011 at 7:03 PM Rating: Excellent
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Did Gbaji lend you his cross?
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#135Kelvyquayo, Posted: Dec 12 2011 at 7:13 PM, Rating: Sub-Default, (Expand Post) Smiley: dubious
#136 Dec 12 2011 at 7:19 PM Rating: Excellent
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Kelvyquayo wrote:
Sweetums wrote:
Why the fuck do you care? You're not having *** with them.



Smiley: dubious
Would did anyone reply to this thread at all; they are not having *** with them?

..and I care because I LOVE EVERYBODYSmiley: blush
Yeah I'm not the one who actually cares if they'll ever have vanilla *** again
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Iamadam the Prophet wrote:

You know that feeling you get when you have a little bit of hope, only to have it ripped away? Sweetums feeds on that.
#137 Dec 12 2011 at 8:05 PM Rating: Excellent
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Quote:
You do realize that if they could get away with it; that many of these people would feed me to the lions and cheer at my agony; I do not doubt it.


Yeah, you need help. Really, REALLY badly.

And anyone who can pretend to love everybody is full of ****. Especially when they stand there and judge the people around them for DARING to be different from them.
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IDrownFish wrote:
Anyways, you all are horrible, @#%^ed up people

lolgaxe wrote:
Never underestimate the healing power of a massive dong.
#138 Dec 12 2011 at 8:07 PM Rating: Excellent
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idiggory, King of Bards wrote:
Quote:
You do realize that if they could get away with it; that many of these people would feed me to the lions and cheer at my agony; I do not doubt it.


Yeah, you need help. Really, REALLY badly.
His earnest creepiness is heartwarming
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Iamadam the Prophet wrote:

You know that feeling you get when you have a little bit of hope, only to have it ripped away? Sweetums feeds on that.
#139 Dec 12 2011 at 8:22 PM Rating: Excellent
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Kelvyquayo wrote:
Do the people deny that the OP has some emotional issues which would be good to overcome? No, you just love the opportunity to spit venom a that which is different.
Do you people deny that when a person dives into NON-vanilla *** that it is difficult to go back to regular ***? No; but I see no arguments against those valid points; but those are the posts that I posted.
I didn't bring up anything religious until you people did;
go back and look at your blatant hypocrisy; or just continue gargling your own bile.

Bijou wrote:
tl;dr: Kelvyquayo needs to LERN2XTIAN


You do realize that if they could get away with it; that many of these people would feed me to the lions and cheer at my agony; I do not doubt it.
I'm not judging; I am not casting stones; and I certainly never said that I am perfect; no I too am a horrible sinner.. the difference is that I realize it. I am simply speaking my mind; but most of these people don't want to hear it simply because it makes them uncomfortable and see how they act like animals to me? Am I hi-jacking this thread to prove a point? maybe.. but I think it's a point well proven; though it will go over the heads of many.
If you are a Christian you surely know that we are called to speak the Truth. Do not just quote the scriptures that are convenient for your reputation; what about: "And ye shall be hated of all men for my name's sake: but he that endureth to the end shall be saved."?


Shouldn't you be out on a ledge or something?
#140 Dec 12 2011 at 8:28 PM Rating: Excellent
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Jesus killed himself; you should too!
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Iamadam the Prophet wrote:

You know that feeling you get when you have a little bit of hope, only to have it ripped away? Sweetums feeds on that.
#141Kelvyquayo, Posted: Dec 12 2011 at 8:39 PM, Rating: Sub-Default, (Expand Post) And you say I am trying too hard?
#142Kelvyquayo, Posted: Dec 12 2011 at 8:43 PM, Rating: Sub-Default, (Expand Post) Aaawwww, what a sweet and healthy statement.
#143 Dec 12 2011 at 8:44 PM Rating: Excellent
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Quote:
Do you people deny that when a person dives into NON-vanilla *** that it is difficult to go back to regular ***?


I imagine it's not an issue if said non-vanilla *** isn't what they need. Are you saying that after, say, role-playing during ***, you'd never be able to have *** without role-play? That's just silly.
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#144 Dec 12 2011 at 8:56 PM Rating: Default
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Message has high abuse count and will not be displayed.
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#145 Dec 12 2011 at 9:06 PM Rating: Excellent
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Probably.

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#146 Dec 12 2011 at 9:14 PM Rating: Excellent
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Relevant back-story is relevant. Smiley: rolleyes

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#147 Dec 12 2011 at 9:30 PM Rating: Good
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Quote:
The next step is that the unsuspecting partner; newly turned on to this supposed "role-play" in the bedroom begins to develop their own neurosis.


********* You are making up filth to try and support your point. But studies show that participants in BDSM are LESS likely to commit violent crimes.

And you assert that situations brought about by your own emotional immaturity are grounds for labeling the behavior dangerous. The problem is that immaturity makes ALL behaviors dangerous. When that's the case, we are no longer talking about BDSM--we are talking about abuse. It's the same way how religious faith turns into religious zealotry.
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IDrownFish wrote:
Anyways, you all are horrible, @#%^ed up people

lolgaxe wrote:
Never underestimate the healing power of a massive dong.
#148Kelvyquayo, Posted: Dec 12 2011 at 9:55 PM, Rating: Sub-Default, (Expand Post) Sure, Idoggory. Your nonsense about "maturity" being the defining factor of morality would actually have some relevance if there were no actual standard of morality..and maybe for you there isn't.. unfortunately for you you are not the center of the universe.
#149 Dec 12 2011 at 9:59 PM Rating: Good
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Kelvyquayo wrote:
you would be eaten alive by those stronger than you
kinky
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Iamadam the Prophet wrote:

You know that feeling you get when you have a little bit of hope, only to have it ripped away? Sweetums feeds on that.
#150 Dec 12 2011 at 10:14 PM Rating: Good
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Smiley: rolleyes

Your propensity to blind yourself to reality is actually quite stunning. You may even be better at it than gbaji.

I mean, even he has never tried to build a strawman argument suggesting that, because some humans are extremely violent and desire to brutalize others, then the world at large is just itching to rip everyone else to shreds.
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IDrownFish wrote:
Anyways, you all are horrible, @#%^ed up people

lolgaxe wrote:
Never underestimate the healing power of a massive dong.
#151 Dec 12 2011 at 10:17 PM Rating: Excellent
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idiggory, King of Bards wrote:
Smiley: rolleyes

Your propensity to blind yourself to reality is actually quite stunning. You may even be better at it than gbaji.

I mean, even he has never tried to build a strawman argument suggesting that, because some humans are extremely violent and desire to brutalize others, then the world at large is just itching to rip everyone else to shreds.
mmmm delicious projection
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Iamadam the Prophet wrote:

You know that feeling you get when you have a little bit of hope, only to have it ripped away? Sweetums feeds on that.
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