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#27 May 05 2006 at 10:37 AM Rating: Good
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Will I come out pasty and rosy-cheeked?
#28 May 05 2006 at 10:43 AM Rating: Excellent
Liberal Conspiracy
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TILT
I figure I'll grab a handful of whatever's on top of the laundry pile Friday morning, shove it into a bag and catch my plane. You sucks will just have to deal Smiley: grin
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Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#29 May 05 2006 at 10:44 AM Rating: Excellent
Nexa
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12,065 posts
Jophiel wrote:
I figure I'll grab a handful of whatever's on top of the laundry pile Friday morning, shove it into a bag and catch my plane. You sucks will just have to deal Smiley: grin


I wish more people would do this, especially the women. Anything to make me look better.

Nexa
____________________________
“It has always been the prerogative of children and half-wits to point out that the emperor has no clothes. But a half-wit remains a half-wit, and the emperor remains an emperor.”
― Neil Gaiman, The Sandman, Vol. 9: The Kindly Ones
#30 May 05 2006 at 11:44 AM Rating: Good
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12,735 posts
Speaking of attire, I think DSD mentioned that for clubs, men can't wear jeans.

I'm guessing I should go with my clubbing gear?

And my sweater. Smiley: bah

Edited, Fri May 5 12:55:17 2006 by Exodus
#31 May 05 2006 at 11:51 AM Rating: Excellent
Liberal Conspiracy
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TILT
Sir Exodus wrote:
Speaking of attire, I think DSD mentioned that for clubs, men can't wear jeans.
With that in mind, my plan is to pack nothing but denim.
____________________________
Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#32 May 05 2006 at 12:11 PM Rating: Good
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3,118 posts
Jophiel wrote:
Sir Exodus wrote:
Speaking of attire, I think DSD mentioned that for clubs, men can't wear jeans.
With that in mind, my plan is to pack nothing but denim.

You're going to go an entire weekend with 1 pair of pants? I'm not sure if by "denim" you mean "jeans". I have a hard time picking up old people jargon.
#34 May 05 2006 at 12:13 PM Rating: Good
It's been one week since you looked at me
Cocked your head to the side and said "I'm angry"
Five days since you laughed at me saying
"Get that together come back and see me"
Three days since the living room
I realized it's all my fault, but couldn't tell you
Yesterday you'd forgiven me
but it'll still be two days till I say I'm sorry

Hold it now and watch the hoodwink
As I make you stop, think
You'll think you're looking at Aquaman
I summon fish to the dish, although I like the Chalet Swiss
I like the sushi
'cause it's never touched a frying pan
Hot like wasabe when I bust rhymes
Big like LeAnn Rimes
Because I'm all about value
Bert Kaempfert's got the mad hits
You try to match wits, you try to hold me but I bust through
Gonna make a break and take a fake
I'd like a stinkin achin shake
I like vanilla, it's the finest of the flavours
Gotta see the show, cause then you'll know
The vertigo is gonna grow
Cause it's so dangerous,
you'll have to sign a waiver

How can I help it if I think you're funny when you're mad
Trying hard not to smile though I feel bad
I'm the kind of guy who laughs at a funeral
Can't understand what I mean?
Well, you soon will
I have a tendency to wear my mind on my sleeve
I have a history of taking off my shirt

It's been one week since you looked at me
Threw your arms in the air
and said "You're crazy"
Five days since you tackled me
I've still got the rug burns on both my knees
It's been three days since the afternoon
You realized it's not my fault
not a moment too soon
Yesterday you'd forgiven me
And now I sit back and wait til you say you're sorry

Chickity China the Chinese chicken
You have a drumstick and your brain stops tickin'
Watchin' X-Files with no lights on
We're dans la maison
I hope the Smoking Man's in this one
Like Harrison Ford I'm getting frantic
Like Sting I'm tantric
Like Snickers, guaranteed to satisfy

Like Kurasawa I make mad films
Okay, I don't make films
But if I did they'd have a Samurai
Gonna get a set a' better clubs
Gonna find the kind with tiny nubs
Just so my irons aren't always flying off the back-swing
Gotta get in tune with Sailor Moon
'Cause the cartoon has got the boom anime babes
That make me think the wrong thing

How can I help it if I think you're funny when you're mad
Tryin' hard not to smile though I feel bad
I'm the kind of guy who laughs at a funeral
Can't understand what I mean?
Well, you soon will
I have a tendency to wear my mind on my sleeve
I have a history of losing my shirt

It's been one week since you looked at me
Dropped your arms to your sides
and said "I'm sorry"
Five days since I laughed at you and said
"You just did just what I thought you were gonna do"
Three days since the living room
We realized we're both to blame,
but what could we do?
Yesterday you just smiled at me
Cause it'll still be two days till we say we're sorry

It'll still be two days till we say we're sorry
It'll still be two days till we say we're sorry
Birchmount Stadium, home of the Robbie
#35 May 05 2006 at 12:14 PM Rating: Excellent
Code Monkey
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7,476 posts
It's been one week since we got to see
Cheatin' lovers and cousins that marry
Five days since they had the show
With the hermaphrodite, the ****, and the crack ho
Three days since we heard the tale
About the guy who learned his woman was a she-male
Yesterday it occurred to me
That I've been watchin' a bit too much Jerry Springer

Holy cow, d'you see it last week?
Well, they had this one freak
Who sucker-punched his whole family
Do you recall when the brawl
Became a total free-for-all
And Jerry's in the middle tryin' to be the referee
Hey, see the stripper with the implants
She likes to lap dance
And date the boyfriend of her mother
Now here come's Jerry's next guest
And it's a slugfest
'Cause it's her trailer trash brother
Nymphomaniac is back on crack
It's like "When Animals Attack"
They all exhibit reprehensible behavior
Hit 'em in the nose, tear off their clothes
Step on their toes, that's how it goes
They get so violent they have to sign a waiver

They're always swearin', cursin', kickin' butt, and pointin' blame
On the air? They don't care, they've got no shame
There was one guy who I'm sure felt a little strange
When he found out that his wife had a sex change
They have a tendency to scream and yell constantly
They have a history of ripping off their shirts

It's been one week since they had the fight
With the Siamese twins and the transvestite
Five days since that awful brawl
They still haven't got the blood off the wall
It's been three days since the bitter feud
Between the KKK and that gay Jewish black dude
Yesterday, finally dawned on me
I'm spendin' way too much time on that Jerry Springer

Guy Guest : Baby, I've been sleepin' with your sister
Gal Guest : Oh? Well, which one?
Guy Guest : All of them
Gal Guest : Oh! Well, I've been sleepin' with your best friend Jake!
Guy Guest : Yah? Well, well me too!
Gal Guest : Oh!
Guy Guest : And I've sleepin' with your dog Woofie!
(barking)
Gal Guest : Woofie, you b-tch!
Gal Guest : Well, I'm also sleepin' with your pet Smiley: goat!
(baaahhing)
Guy Guest : That Smiley: goat doesn't love you!

Once you start watchin', there's just no stoppin'
Your brain shuts down, then your IQ's droppin'
Jerry's the king of confrontation
He's a sensation
He puts the 'sin' in syndication
It's totally worthless, like a bad check
It's like a train wreck
Don't wanna stare but you can't look away
Like Sally Jesse he does talk shows
But with more weirdos
The ratings jumpin' higher everyday
If you've seen the show, well then you know
It's just as low as you can go
The guests are tacky and they're lacking in their hygiene
And pretty soon some ugly goon
Comes in the room and then it's BOOM
In the face of some unsuspecting drag queen

Well it's the kind of show where people scream obscenities
Yankin' hair, throwin' chairs at their hubbies
"Jerry! Jerry!" Now the crowd starts their favorite chant
Should I turn off my TV? I just can't
I have a tendency to watch it religiously
I have a history of taping each one

It's been one week since the show about
Psycho killers with problems they should work out
Five days since the big surprise
When some loser's wife said she's still dating twenty guys
Three days since he interviewed
A bunch of psychic **** star midgets who were all nude
Yesterday, it occurred to me
That I've been watchin' a bit too much Jerry Springer
Tired of wastin' my time on that Jerry Springer
I've got way too much class to watch Jerry Springer
Come over here and pull on my finger


Edited, Fri May 5 13:21:33 2006 by Danalog
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#36 May 05 2006 at 12:16 PM Rating: Good
Tracer Bullet
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12,636 posts

There had better be an exhaustive digital record of this event.


#37 May 05 2006 at 12:17 PM Rating: Excellent
Nexa
*****
12,065 posts
trickybeck wrote:
There had better be an exhaustive digital record of this event.


We have all agreed that we will be doing a photo diary. However, to be artistic, it will only consist of extreme closeups of non-sexual body parts. You will see many photos of my elbow at various locations throughout Boston. Enjoy!

Nexa
____________________________
“It has always been the prerogative of children and half-wits to point out that the emperor has no clothes. But a half-wit remains a half-wit, and the emperor remains an emperor.”
― Neil Gaiman, The Sandman, Vol. 9: The Kindly Ones
#38 May 05 2006 at 12:19 PM Rating: Good
Tracer Bullet
*****
12,636 posts
Nexa wrote:
You will see many photos of my elbow at various locations throughout Boston. Enjoy!

Nexa

You don't know what you just agreed to.

#39 May 05 2006 at 12:20 PM Rating: Excellent
Nexa
*****
12,065 posts
trickybeck wrote:
Nexa wrote:
You will see many photos of my elbow at various locations throughout Boston. Enjoy!

Nexa

You don't know what you just agreed to.


Of course I did. How do you think I'm financing this whole thing?

Nexa
____________________________
“It has always been the prerogative of children and half-wits to point out that the emperor has no clothes. But a half-wit remains a half-wit, and the emperor remains an emperor.”
― Neil Gaiman, The Sandman, Vol. 9: The Kindly Ones
#40 May 05 2006 at 12:29 PM Rating: Good
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14,454 posts
Sir Exodus wrote:
Speaking of attire, I think DSD mentioned that for clubs, men can't wear jeans.

I'm guessing I should go with my clubbing gear?

And my sweater. Smiley: bah

Edited, Fri May 5 12:55:17 2006 by Exodus


no sneakers in the clubs either.
#41 May 05 2006 at 12:30 PM Rating: Good
Lady DSD wrote:
Sir Exodus wrote:
Speaking of attire, I think DSD mentioned that for clubs, men can't wear jeans.

I'm guessing I should go with my clubbing gear?

And my sweater. Smiley: bah



no sneakers in the clubs either.
Can I wear chaps? So far my *** is going to be bare since I cant wear jeans..
#42 May 05 2006 at 12:34 PM Rating: Good
Imaginary Friend
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16,112 posts
Elderon the Wise wrote:
Lady DSD wrote:
Sir Exodus wrote:
Speaking of attire, I think DSD mentioned that for clubs, men can't wear jeans.

I'm guessing I should go with my clubbing gear?

And my sweater. Smiley: bah



no sneakers in the clubs either.
Can I wear chaps? So far my *** is going to be bare since I cant wear jeans..



how about knee-high black army boots with chains and studs all over them?


seriously, no sneakers? My whole getup is a suit/tie/pinstripes W/ sneakers!!
____________________________
With the receiver in my hand..
#43 May 05 2006 at 12:34 PM Rating: Good
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14,454 posts
that was so 5 years ago Kelvy. Time for an outfit update!
#44 May 05 2006 at 12:35 PM Rating: Good
When you say "clubbing" you mean seals right?
#45 May 05 2006 at 12:36 PM Rating: Good
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of course.
#46 May 05 2006 at 12:43 PM Rating: Excellent
Nexa
*****
12,065 posts
Elderon the Wise wrote:
When you say "clubbing" you mean seals right?


Also puppies, since I'm planning to dress like this.

I just need to find a cigarette holder now.

Nexa
____________________________
“It has always been the prerogative of children and half-wits to point out that the emperor has no clothes. But a half-wit remains a half-wit, and the emperor remains an emperor.”
― Neil Gaiman, The Sandman, Vol. 9: The Kindly Ones
#47 May 05 2006 at 12:45 PM Rating: Good
Excellent. You guys don't mind if I keep their eyeballs when they pop out right? I'm making a necklass.
#48 May 05 2006 at 1:07 PM Rating: Good
Imaginary Friend
*****
16,112 posts
Lady DSD wrote:
that was so 5 years ago Kelvy. Time for an outfit update!


how about a wee-kilt and a muscle shirt? ( i got great legs Smiley: grin)
____________________________
With the receiver in my hand..
#49 May 05 2006 at 1:08 PM Rating: Good
*****
14,454 posts
whatcha wearing under the kilt?

your answer will determine my response on whether or not its fitting
Smiley: grin
#50 May 05 2006 at 1:09 PM Rating: Good
Kelvyquayo wrote:
how about a wee-kilt
I think they throw pAAAshtiks into the bay there.
#51 May 05 2006 at 1:18 PM Rating: Good
Imaginary Friend
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16,112 posts
Lady DSD wrote:
whatcha wearing under the kilt?


It's where I keep me bagpipes.
____________________________
With the receiver in my hand..
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