If Patton were PresFollow

I thought this was funny

If General George Patton were alive and President of the USA,this would be
>his Fireside Speech:
>
>My fellow Americans:
>
>As you all know, the defeat of Iraq's regime has been completed.
>
>Since congress does not want to spend any more money on this war, our
>mission in Iraq is complete.
>
>This morning I gave the order for a complete removal of all American forces
>from Iraq. This action will be complete within 30 days. It is now time to
>begin the reckoning.
>
>Before me, I have two lists. One list contains the names of countries which
>have stood by our side during the Iraq conflict. This list is short: The
>United Kingdom, Spain, Bulgaria, Australia, Norway and Poland are some of
>the countries listed there.
>
>The other list contains everyone not on the first list. Most of the world's
>nations are on that list.
>
>My press secretary will be distributing copies of both lists later this
>evening.
>
>Let me start by saying that effective immediately, foreign aid to those
>nations on List 2 ceases immediately and indefinitely. The money saved
>during the first year alone will pretty much pay for the costs of the Iraqi
>war.
>
>The American people are no longer going to pour money into third world
>hellholes and watch those government leaders grow fat on corruption.
>
>Need help with a famine? Wrestling with an epidemic? Call France.
>
>In the future, together with Congress, I will work to cut taxes and solve
>some local problems.
>
>On that note, a word to terrorist organizations. ***** with us and we will
>hunt you down and eliminate you and all your friends from the face of the
>earth.
>
>Thirsting for a gutsy country to terrorize? Try France, or maybe China.
>
>To Israel and the Palestinian Authority. You, boys. Work out a peace deal
>now. Just note that Camp David is closed.
>
>Maybe all of you can go to Russia for negotiations. They have some great
>palaces there. Big tables, too.
>
>I'm ordering the immediate severing of diplomatic relations with France,
>Germany, and Russia. Thanks for all your help, comrades. We are retiring
>from NATO as well. Bon chance, mes amis.
>
>I have instructed the Mayor of New York City to begin towing the many UN
>diplomatic vehicles located in Manhattan with more than two unpaid tickets
>to sites where those vehicles will be stripped, shredded and crushed.
>
>I don't care about whatever treaty pertains to this. Pay your tickets
>tomorrow or watch your precious Benzes, Beamers, and limos be turned over to
>some of the finest chop shops in the world. I love New York.
>
>A special note to our neighbors. Canada is on List 2. Since we are going to
>be seeing a lot more of each other, you folks might want to try not pissing
>us off for a change. Mexico is also on List 2. President Fox and his entire
>corrupt government really need an attitude adjustment. I have a couple of
>extra tank and infantry divisions sitting around. Guess where I'm gonna put
>'em? Yep, border security. So start doing something with your oil.
>
>Oh, by the way, the United States is abrogating the NAFTA treaty--starting
>now.
>
>It is time for America to focus on its own welfare and its own citizens.
>Some will accuse us of isolationism. I answer them by saying darn tootin'.
>
>Nearly a century of trying to help folks live a decent life around the world
>has only earned us the undying enmity of just about everyone on the planet.
>It is time to cut taxes here because we will not be spending on other
>peoples problems.
>
>To the nations on List 1, a final thought. Thanks guys. We owe you.
>
>To the nations on List 2, a final thought. Drop dead. God bless America.
>
>Thank you and good night.

That's waaaaaay too politic for Patton.

It'd be more like this:

"I'm staying to kill me some towelheads. Go home if you need your momma."

"We don't need no funding, we have our rifles! When they run out of bullets, we have bludgeoning weapons! When those break, we have our fists!"

I am Patton reincarnate.

Yes, I am pissed off, thanks for asking.

What, no SF love?

Eb

Patton was cool. Patton with nukes would scare the **** out of me.

lebanon is kind of a non-issue now that we have their 7.1 tons of refined uranium and they are supposedly going to destroy their chemical weapons stockpiles. If I were syria, i would be pissing myself right about now. Iran, eh, too much history of appeasment, and too much political fallout if we took action there. Best wait for an internal revolt to occur, but that could take a while.