I'm to ashamed to tell you what actually happened. But I'll try. It involved a trip to my uncle's farm where among other animals, he also raised goats. I should explain to you that my uncle was a different kind of person.
One night, after taking a bath, I couldn't find my clothes. My uncle said they had been washed and were drying in the goat barn, which seemed as weird then as it sounds now. However, being young and naive, I ran to the goat barn, expecting to get my clothes, but instead, I was confronted by a circle of men. They wore dead goat heads and nothing else. That's how I knew they were men. They were chanting something low and rhythmic, and I couldn't understand it at first. After a minute or so, I started to recognize the chant. "Goat boy, goat boy, time to be the goats toy!" they chanted in unison growing louder and louder.
I was too scared to move, but after my eyes started to adjust to the dim light, I could see that my clothes were there. However, the goats were wearing them. My first thought was, "Boy, are they ever gonna stink!" Actually, that was my second thought. My first thought involved a strong desire to see my mom. Before I could dwell on it, the men started to slowly move around in the circle, half dancing, half duck walking.
It was about this time they led a goat into the center of the circle, next to me. I had never seen this goat before-- he was huge! He had, I now know today, what was a huge erection. At that age I just thought he had another leg hanging down. "Goat boy, goat boy, time to be the goat's toy". I think you can guess what happened next.
WRONG!
I was small, naked and scared sh1tless, but I wasn't about to become this goat's *****-- or whatever a female goat is called. Anyhow I saw that the only light was coming from a kerosene lantern hanging near the door.
I broke for the door and made it easier than I thought I would. This was due to the fact that the goat headed men were hypnotized by their own chanting and thoughts, no doubt, of what was about to transpire. When I got to the door I grabbed the lantern and threw it in to a pile of hay, where it instantly exploded into flames. I ran out the barn door and slammed it shut. Then I threw down the 2x4 used to lock the door from the outside. Unfortunately for them there wasn't another exit.
Soon the screams and the bleating started. They begged me to unlock the door but it fell on deaf ears. I did mention I was deaf? I lip read so that is why I was able to tell what they were chanting. I also just assumed they were screaming and the goats were bleating, but I didn't care. I was happy and rich to boot. You see, I was my weird uncle's only heir and he was loaded. Besides, wasn't he about ready to let some goat mount me like a rented stud and put his leg, er, thing into my ******? Well, in truth, actually, no, he wasn't.
You see my weird uncle was a great practical joker I later found out. The whole thing was a set up to freak me out. Well, I have to live with those imagined screams and bleats for the rest of my life. The only consolation is that I am now filthy rich. So what if I burned those fellas like a lesbian burns her bra. Still, sometimes at night, when I'm sleeping, I see those guys and I can lip read them, "Goat boy, goat boy, time to be the goat's toy. Goat boy, goat boy..."
The end.
Totem