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#1 Apr 27 2004 at 1:36 PM Rating: Excellent
...into my crazy mind.

On the bus up to NY, it was late, I was reading, and I couldn't stop thinking of stuff. I felt like I had developed super hearing because every little nuance of sound was overriding what I was trying to pay attention to - my book.

I decided I'd just pick up a pencil and some paper and write down what ever came to mind, get it all out of there so I could relax and read my book.

This is what came out, be afraid, be very afraid.

Wrinkled papers with Skeet's chicken scratch on it wrote:
*Click*
Staring out the window, I clearly see the blur that is life...

I am *click*

I am wearing glasses, not mine, they tease me by making what's in front of me crystal clear, but when I look out, out there, looking for something - something interesting - anything - it's all interesting - I'm only left with guess-tamations of what I'm looking at.

The sky takes a picture of me *click* What the fu[b][/b]ck is that?

Looking out the window once more... It's all mist, mist with headlights. My eyes, not used to their current prescription, fight between looking outside or focusing on the reflection on my window, I look like a Van Gough painting *click* That's getting pretty annoying.

A loving finger, perhaps two of them, gently cross my back. "What's wrong Honey?"
"Nothing" I say as I caress her ankle. Why her ankle? I don't know, why not?

Flashes of light gleam off the corner of these lenses, keep thinking somebody is shooting a laser at me. But no, it's just these.. These foreign objects I'm currently viewing the world through. They make things appear as if I'm in a movie, everything I see, moving before I do... Almost out of body.

Is it OK to wear somebody else's prescription? I don't know, don't care really.

Though legally blind, I don't have sissy eyes like most others do. "You sleep with them in??" They ask, their eyes starting to water at the mere thought of putting something in their eyes.

"Yes!" I say heroically, "I wear contacts, sleep with them in" (pause for effect) "AND I don't take them out for months!" I say as they gasp deeply. "Jay - The contact wearer" jumping up on their list of toughest men alive *click*

I have this theory you see *click*

I have this idea you see. I will wear these contacts until they, in a law defying, somehow-not-bad-for-my-eyes-kind-of-way, become my eyes. *click*

I don't like swimming. Only then are my faux eyes found out. "Come on! Jump in!" They say.

"I can't.. wearing contacts"

"Take them out!"

Sure, that seems like a plan to me, I'll just take them out, set them in hover mode as I jump in that big blue blur there, perhaps I'll swing in from that long brown blur, which is hanging from the green blur right above me. We can play Marco Polo without fear of me cheating, not that I would were I able to see (ok, I probably would). Then I'll return to my contacts after swimming, they'll be hovering right where I left them, still moist and ready to be worn again. *click*

With my genius, and impeccable "one one-thousand" skills, I've managed to deduce that these 'clicks' are coming every 10 *click*.. 9 and a half seconds.

I've grown to hate wasted effort, or at least 'not like it" a lot. Times like these, I don't see landscapes, I see drawings of "Amy" or "Stacy" with landscapes cleverly drawn inside each hollow letter, hollow like its respective owner. Wastes, so much wasted effort on the wiles of young love. No, not even that, it's all my *****' fault really. I tried to tell him that the drawing wont help, but he blames it on my inability to follow through with "the plan". It was never fully thought out, this "plan", all I remember is it involved "her" and I alone in a room somehow. I show her the picture and tears start to well up in her eyes as she drinks the beauty from my painstakingly tedious (30 min worth max) work. Lust replaces tears and she begins to ravish me, though I wasn't quite sure what ravishing was back then. I'm not too sure I know what it is now. Nah, I've been ravished, I'm very ravish-able.

I'd ravish me *click*

Ha! The passengers windshield wiper, That's what was making that incessant clicking noise!

*click*


I'm thinking about editing it, even expanding on it a bit.
#2 Apr 27 2004 at 1:38 PM Rating: Decent
I just had a BZ flashback reading that.

Nice.

Eb
#3 Apr 27 2004 at 1:39 PM Rating: Decent
wow skeet you wrote that? good one!
#4 Apr 27 2004 at 1:39 PM Rating: Good
*****
16,160 posts
Just say "No!" to drugs.

Totem
#5 Apr 27 2004 at 1:42 PM Rating: Decent
Talking to drugs is a sure sign that you have a problem.

Eb

Edited, Tue Apr 27 14:42:28 2004 by pickleprince
#6 Apr 27 2004 at 1:44 PM Rating: Excellent
Quote:
Just say "No!" to drugs.

Totem


Come on Totem, you can do better than that.

We'll go ahead and pretend that never happened.

Take two, *click*.
#7 Apr 27 2004 at 1:46 PM Rating: Good
**
315 posts
Skeeter the Venerable wrote:

I don't like swimming. Only then are my faux eyes found out. "Come on! Jump in!" They say.

"I can't.. wearing contacts"

"Take them out!"

Sure, that seems like a plan to me, I'll just take them out, set them in hover mode as I jump in that big blue blur there, perhaps I'll swing in from that long brown blur, which is hanging from the green blur right above me. We can play Marco Polo without fear of me cheating, not that I would were I able to see (ok, I probably would). Then I'll return to my contacts after swimming, they'll be hovering right where I left them, still moist and ready to be worn again. *click*


I found the entire thing very, very amusing, but I have to say that I take the above very seriously. It SUCKS being blind as a bat and having to deal with the contact/glasses b*ll**it. I finally gave up an leave my in swimming or not.
#8 Apr 27 2004 at 1:50 PM Rating: Excellent
Quote:
It SUCKS being blind as a bat and having to deal with the contact/glasses bu[/b]llsh[b]it.


FTFY

Fixed That For You

That statement deserves to have real cuss words in it.
#9 Apr 27 2004 at 1:52 PM Rating: Good
**
315 posts
Thanks Skeeter! Sounds much better with the whole thing typed out.
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