Alright you hackers... go have funFollow

DEAR SIR,
HOW ARE YOU AND YOUR FAMILY? I HOPE ALL IS WELL.
YOU WILL BE SURPRISE TO RECEIVE THIS LETTER BUT WHEN YOU GO THROUGH IT
YOU MIGHT NOT BE SURPRISE AGAIN IF THE INFORMATION HAS SOMETHING TO DO
WITH YOU.
I AM THE CONFIDENTIAL SECRETARY FOR THE INVESTMENT CONTROLLER OF A
SOUTH AFRICAN BASED INVESTMENT CORPORATION.MY BOSS/PARTNER INSTRUCTED ME TO
CONTACT YOU IN RESPECT OF A CLAIM/DIVIDEND,WHICH MATURED SINCE 2000.THE
INVESTOR AFTER COLLECTING THE SAID RETURN OF INVESTMENT FROM OUR FIRM
AND DEPOSITED THE CASH WITH A SECURITY COMPANY DIED AFTER ONE WEEK IN A
MOTOR ACCIDENT,IN NOVEMBER 2000 AND FROM THE CONTENT OF HIS FILE WITH
US,WE NOTICED THAT THERE WAS NO NEXT OF KIN IN HIS DETAILS AS HE
PROMISED TO FORWARD THE INFORMATION LATER TO US.BUT THIS HE DID NOT PROVIDE
UNTIL HE DIED. WITH FURTHER INVESTIGATION TO TRACE THE ROOT OF THE
INVESTOR,THIS MADE THINGS MUCH COMPLEX AS THE INFORMATION WE GOT CONFIRMED
THAT HIS WIFE AND ONLY SON DIED IN RUSSIA IN AN AIRCRASH IN THE YEAR
1998.
HOWEVER,MY BOSS HAS TAKING IT UPON HIMSELF TO TRACE THE NEXT OF KIN IF
POSSIBLE TO CLAIM THE US$35,000,000,00 (THIRTY FIVE MILLION UNITED
STATE DOLLARS ONLY) WHICH IS THE TOTAL SUM PAYABLE TO THE NEXT OF KIN AS
ALL THE LOCAL TAXES HAS ALREADY BEEN DEDUCTED AND THE CASH ALREADY
WITHDRAWN FROM THE SOUTH AFRICAN RESERVE BANK AND BOXED.THE INVESTOR HAS
DEPOSITED THIS AMOUNT /CASH WITH A SECURITY COMPANY WITHOUT THE COMPANY
KNOWING THE CONTENT OF THE BOX FOR SECURITY REASONS BEFORE HIS DEATH.
THE CONTAINS WAS DECLEARED TO BE COMPANY TREASURE
DOCUMENTS,FILES(PAPER).
I AM CONTACTING YOU BECAUSE YOUR LAST NAME AND THAT OF THE INVESTOR IS
THE SAME,WHICH MY BOSS SUSPECTED THAT YOU MIGHT BE THE INVESTOR'S
RELATION. PLEASE RECONFIRM TO US IMMEDIATELY IF YOU HAVE ANY BROTHER WHO WAS
78YEARS OLD BEFORE HE DIED IN 1998.IF IT IS TRUE,WE WILL ARRANGE FOR
YOU TO MAKE THIS CLAIM AS SOON AS POSSILBE.BUT IF NOT WE HAVE NO OTHER
OPTION THAN TO PROCESS IT WITH YOUR NAME AND COLLECT THE MONEY TO AVOID
THE CASH BEING RETURNED TO THE SOUTH AFRICA GOVERNMENT AS
UNTRACABLE/UNCLAIMED DIVIDEND.AS WE CANNOT AFFORD TO WAIT AND SEE SUCH AMOUNT OF
MONEY WASTE INTO THE GOVERNMENT POCKET .FOR YOUR INFORMATION ,IF YOU ARE
WILLING TO ASSIST IN CLAMING THIS FUNDS ,PLEASE CONTACT ME AS SOON AS
POSSIBLE WITHIN FOURTEEN WORKING DAYS { TWO WEEKS}FROM TODAY.BEFORE THE
SOUTH AFRICAN GOVERNMENT TEAMS TO KNOW ABOUT IT.PLEASE DISREGARD MY
PROPOSAL TO USE YOUR NAME TO CLAIM IT IF THE INVESTOR IS REALLY YOUR
BROTHER.BUT IF NOT WE WILL SHARE THE MONEY ON 50% EACH AFTER THE CASH HAS
BEEN PAID TO YOU.
NOTE THAT THIS BUSINESS IS 100% LEGAL AND RISK FREE.
PLEASE TREAT THIS AS MOST URGENT AND CONFIDENTIAL
SIGNIFY YOUR INTEREST BY CONTACTING ME VIA MY PRIVATE EMAIL
amudu_001@irangate.net
BEST REGARDS,
MR AMUDU THOMAS

This is the second one this month that I have recieved. Annoys me. Stupid **********

/raises hand

"Hand jobless"?

should I have put it more blunt? Not even Rosey Palms or her 5 sister would have anything to do with your limp noodle!

Edited, Sat Apr 17 14:09:25 2004 by Cherrabwyn

aye, soo... who wants to wash my car for me?

Hrmmm... Katie counts ************ as getting a hand job? Or is any hand job a "Rosie Palm et al" scenario. I need to know so I can tell the guys down at the garage that I got a hand job, but I need to know how to phrase it.

I'm not sure if you could have been more blunt, but you could have been less confusing.

Limp noodle insults hurt more when directed at someone who didn't already proposition Flea with flaccid ***** sex

Of course, if you don't want to contact the FBI you can always go with this route.

LoL, Jophiel, that was just to funny. that is some brains and i love it...