The question has come up, time and time again, as to what factors influence the drop rate of coffer keys. A source of suffering for any who have ever tried to get their AF gear, coffer keys seem to drop significantly less often than any other item in the game - particularly when you need one. The issue of coffers not dropping often coincides with Low Lot Disease, a cure for which I am still researching.
That said, I have found a foolproof, failsafe way to force coffer keys to drop more often. As Carbuncle is my home and all of you are my community, I thought it **** to share this with you first, before posting in the main forum.
To make coffer keys drop more frequently.
- Some loose pieces of wood
- Basic carpentry skills
- 100+ proof rum, with 21 hot peppers steeped in it
- A live chicken
- A knife.
Start by constructing a shrine to Baron Samedi, most powerful of the Guédé and chief loa in Voodoo. He is the loa of death and controls the passageway between the worlds of the dead and the living. His strength is beyond compare; you really want to get on this guy's good side! Plans for the shrine are not included here, you can Google them up when you're ready.
Make an offering of the rum (set it out on the altar, or set fire to it, but do not drink it yourself!). Burn the incense. Look up a good prayer to Baron Samedi online and practice your finest Hatian Creole accent. In your prayer, ask for greater success in obtaining coffer keys, being sure to remind Baron Samedi of the strong connection between the death of mobs and the dropping of the key. (FFXI is very `new world`, so sometimes the loa have to be brought up to date!)
After you have asked for aid, be sure to make an offering of the chicken. Use the knife to slaughter the bird, spilling blood and feathers upon the altar. This grants you one dead chicken (Rare/Ex, can't trade it or sell it at the AH). The dead chicken will dramatically increase your coffer key drop rate!
I absolutely swear this is true! I have zero scientific evidence to provide, but when I started waving a dead chicken at my monitor tonight, we picked up five Eldieme Keys in relatively short order! Obviously this was the thing that we'd needed all along, and so now I am passing the knowledge on to you, for the betterment of all man-kind.
My apartment complex has rules against pets.
Assure your landlord that the chicken is not a pet - indeed, it will trouble them hardly at all in it's short, short life.
I am unable to slaughter a chicken myself.
Make friends with a sadistic 12 year old who likes to throw rocks at cats. He can help you with the actual slaughtering process; just be sure to sprinkle some blood from the carcass, along with a few feathers, onto the altar you've constructed. And keep him away from the rum - we don't want to corrupt the young.
I'm waving my chicken at my monitor, but coffer keys aren't dropping as frequently as you said.
Try using a better quality rum; Baron Samedi is sometimes picky and likes the good stuff.
Oh, yuck! There's blood and chicken bits all over my keyboard!
Try shaking the chicken out a little better; there's no reason to scrimp on the offering.
I was getting keys, but am seeing them no longer; I still have my dead chicken.
Your chicken has probably run out of juice; start the process over and prepare another one. Discard your chicken, or invite it to dinner, whichever you prefer.
disclaimer: this is humor, and satire - don't kill chickens, y'all.