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I have lived in the same apartment for the last 8 years...Follow

#1 Dec 09 2012 at 7:39 PM Rating: Good
And never once have I had a problem with my direct neighbors. Sure, there were the kids throwing rocks in the parking lot and generally tearing up the landscaping, and the occasional loud car coming through at 3:00AM full of drunk idiots, but all stuff I could deal with. However, I recently acquired a new hood rat neighbor who insists on having all his friends over and bumping loud music all hours of the night and day. Last night I had to endure from about 9:00PM to 1:00AM, and tonight it started again at ~7:00PM. Before I walk on over there and make a new enemy, I thought I'd see if anyone here had any creative ideas for dealing with jerks like this.

Shall I lace his porch step and door handle with vaseline? Light a string of firecrackers on his back porch? Gently arrange a nail under his front car tire?

#2 Dec 09 2012 at 7:51 PM Rating: Good
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Get an engineering degree and when he leaves to go to work, go Jigsaw on his place. Not only will you teach him a lesson, you'll improve your education as well.
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#3 Dec 09 2012 at 8:14 PM Rating: Excellent
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Invite him over for a drink, so you can hash your differences out.

I recommend Amontillado, cold.
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#4 Dec 09 2012 at 8:14 PM Rating: Excellent
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My advice is twice as good as normal advice.

Edited, Dec 9th 2012 9:15pm by Timelordwho
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#5 Dec 09 2012 at 8:24 PM Rating: Excellent
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Timelordwho wrote:
Invite him over for a drink, so you can hash your differences out.

I recommend Amontillado, cold.
I'd go with a nice peaty Islay, like Laphroaig. Then you can berate his lack of manhood if/when he can't drink it.
#6 Dec 09 2012 at 8:27 PM Rating: Good
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Spoonless wrote:
Timelordwho wrote:
Invite him over for a drink, so you can hash your differences out.

I recommend Amontillado, cold.
I'd go with a nice peaty Islay, like Laphroaig. Then you can berate his lack of manhood if/when he can't drink it.


Hemlock, definitely Hemlock
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#7 Dec 09 2012 at 8:32 PM Rating: Good
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Timelordwho wrote:
Invite him over for a drink, so you can hash your differences out.

I recommend Amontillado, cold.


Won't work, walls are too thin and drywall is a poor sound insulator.
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#8 Dec 09 2012 at 8:51 PM Rating: Excellent
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I can't believe the people on this forum, a long time poster is asking for serious advice, and none of you have said PIIHP.
Smiley: oyvey
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#9 Dec 09 2012 at 8:56 PM Rating: Excellent
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We would if you or Nix was having the issue.
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#10 Dec 09 2012 at 10:37 PM Rating: Excellent
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2AM organ harvest followed by a quick cash only sale on chinese Ebay. it's the only way to be sure of silence...
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#11 Dec 09 2012 at 11:06 PM Rating: Excellent
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#12 Dec 09 2012 at 11:38 PM Rating: Excellent
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Screenshot
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#13 Dec 10 2012 at 12:16 AM Rating: Good
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Hide sardines relatively close to his door. Eventually it'll start smelling really bad, and added bonus it'll attract the strays.
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#14 Dec 10 2012 at 1:46 AM Rating: Excellent
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I say go Shaowstrike's avatar on his ***.
#15 Dec 10 2012 at 1:52 AM Rating: Excellent
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BrownDuck wrote:
Shall I lace his porch step and door handle with vaseline? Light a string of firecrackers on his back porch? Gently arrange a nail under his front car tire?
Find a way to shut off his power by remote.
#16 Dec 10 2012 at 1:57 AM Rating: Good
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What is the cuttoff time for noise ordinances around your place? Where I live it's 10 pm. Call the cops at 10:01 or whatever. Every school/work night.

And/or alternatively buy a IEC 61672:2003 compliant sound level meter, to show your neighbour how obnoxious he's being on a school/work night.
#17 Dec 10 2012 at 3:26 AM Rating: Excellent
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Professor stupidmonkey wrote:
Spoonless wrote:
[quote=Timelordwho]Invite him over for a drink, so you can hash your differences out.

I recommend Amontillado, cold.
I'd go with a nice peaty Islay, like Laphroaig. Then you can berate his lack of manhood if/when he can't drink it.


Hemlock, definitely ******************* you guys, you've got me craving whiskey at ******* 10:30 AM on a Monday morning. Smiley: motz
#18 Dec 10 2012 at 3:36 AM Rating: Good
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It's 8:36 pm here...
#19 Dec 10 2012 at 3:56 AM Rating: Good
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Ok, you drink the booze for me then so I can live vigorously through you or something.
#20 Dec 10 2012 at 4:29 AM Rating: Excellent
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Spoonless wrote:
Quote:
Invite him over for a drink, so you can hash your differences out.

I recommend Amontillado, cold.
I'd go with a nice peaty Islay, like Laphroaig. Then you can berate his lack of manhood if/when he can't drink it.


People who were whooshed: See above.
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#21 Dec 10 2012 at 4:35 AM Rating: Good
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8 years of renting? Over halfway to a house on a 15 year.

Call the Cops and Landlord. I'm sure the landlord won't be to happy they've got a rental being used as a Club.
#22 Dec 10 2012 at 6:52 AM Rating: Good
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Move out of the apartment and into a house with 4+ acres of land, with the house situated smack dab in the middle of it, surrounded by trees.
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#23 Dec 10 2012 at 7:02 AM Rating: Good
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Timelordwho wrote:
Spoonless wrote:
Quote:
Invite him over for a drink, so you can hash your differences out.

I recommend Amontillado, cold.
I'd go with a nice peaty Islay, like Laphroaig. Then you can berate his lack of manhood if/when he can't drink it.


People who were whooshed: See above.
Literary references have no place on the internet! Smiley: mad

I might have gotten it if you had said "cellar temperature". Smiley: lol

Edited, Dec 10th 2012 10:05am by Spoonless
#24 Dec 10 2012 at 7:26 AM Rating: Good
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I was thinking of this when I posted:

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#25 Dec 10 2012 at 7:50 AM Rating: Good
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Uglysasquatch wrote:
Move out of the apartment and into a house with 4+ acres of land, with the house situated smack dab in the middle of it, surrounded by trees.
That's just asking to be abducted and **** probed.
#26 Dec 10 2012 at 8:56 AM Rating: Good
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Uglysasquatch wrote:
Move out of the apartment and into a house with 4+ acres of land, with the house situated smack dab in the middle of it, surrounded by trees.

I have one of those. In the summer when the windows are open I can hear my neighbors partying. It's birds that interrupt my sleep though.
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