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Speaking ill of the deceased...Follow

#52 Dec 05 2012 at 5:59 AM Rating: Good
Ghost in the Machine
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I guess it depends on what the circumstances were. I'm guessing it wasn't a case of him jumping her while she was out walking.

Regardless, it would be a really bad idea to come forward now. People would, like me, ask why she's kept it a secret all this time, and why she's bringing it out now that he's dead. The rape itself would not register with them, but discrediting a dead guy would. The backlash would be out of this world.
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#53 Dec 06 2012 at 9:36 AM Rating: Good
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LockeColeMA wrote:
[quote=The One and Only Poldaran]

No, she didn't come forward with the allegations when they happened. She resolved to move on and just bury the past. I personally thought she was making the wrong choice, but it would have come down to a case of "he said/she said" and she was so shaken up about it that she didn't think she could make it through a court case. Her issue is that after working so hard to get away from her past and move beyond it, it's suddenly back in her life. I feel bad for her, but there's not much she can do. Luckily she's not living in the same town any more; it would be a lot worse for her then.




I die a little inside every time I hear this. This is one of the reasons that rapes continue to happen. Victims just move on with their lives and the perpetrators are free to feel their entitlement and do it again to another. I'm sure that at the time she felt she was making the right decision for her, but I have to wonder how many other women suffered because she didn't speak up.
#54 Dec 12 2012 at 2:23 PM Rating: Good
I really feel for your friend Locke, that has to be extremely hard to go through. A couple months ago, a sort of family friend of mine died and I had similar feelings about the situation. This guy was not a good person. He had stolen, cheated, done all sorts of nasty drugs, lied, etc. He never did anything to me personally, but I saw the wave of destruction he caused throughout his later teen years and into his twenties. I felt the worst for his mother. His parents weren't bad people, but for whatever reason their son turned out to be a really bad apple, and their daughter got pregnant at the age of 12 and decided to keep the kid.

Anyways, he got diagnosed with prostate cancer and died a couple months ago, at the age of 27. He left behind three or four kids, a wife and an ex-wife. I felt terrible for his family, but knowing all of the **** he had done in his life, I couldn't help but feel that he deserved what he got. Which in turn made me feel like a terrible person, but you can't always help what you think. What you can help is how you act on your thoughts. I didn't share my thoughts or feelings with his family or friends, and I don't think your friend should share hers either. I agree with the others who said that if she feels the need to get things off her chest, she has you to talk to.
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