What are the best attack weapons?
Though it's not usually advisable in party play...BRD has the highest skill in Dagger. So if you're trying to build for melee, that's usually what to build around. Sword may also be good, especially at lower level when dagger WS are pretty lacking if you're not a THF.
For group play, you will pretty much be using staves. 51+ basically elemental staves. Chanter's Staff is also a potential item for buffs, and as an upgrade from Signa (though a rather minor, and expensive one).
What are the best songs to play? ( i have them all up to 29)
Song selection can vary on the party. In general, melee will get some combination of Minuet, Madrigal, and March.
At 29, there's a general lack of truly meaningful melee gear, so Minuet/Madrigal is probably going to be preferable. As you progress, melee will have better gear available, and Sushi will be more effective, so they may not need Madrigal to have a good hit rate. That, and/or tanks relying on Blink Tanking may make March a better second song to play.
Mages are pretty much Ballad at this point. You can give them an Etude as well, if so desired.
You probably don't -need- to eat food. Better CHR food options are reasonably expensive for the relative lack of use you get from them (Tavnazian Tacos, Tuna Sushi, Flint Caviar).
You could consider dirt cheap, minorly effective food like Chai (+2 CHR -2 VIT for 3 hours), or possibly MP oriented food if you're helping heal a bit, such as pies.
If an instrument is available for a song you normally use, then try to get it. Also, get the HQ (if available) if it increases the Song+. Most crafted instruments have Song +1 on the NQ, and Song +2 on the HQ.
Some have a "+2" version" (blue box), but this is pretty much useless as the increase is only on the other stats, not on the song effect.
You should have (at least):
Mary's Horn (expensive, but you'll keep this unless you get relic)
Royal Spearman's Horn or San D'Orian Horn
Fairie Piccolo +1
Now, there are plenty more that you could have
. Those are just to cover the bare, bare essentials of Minuet, March, Madrigal, Elegy, and Lullaby. Ballad doesn't have a full-time instrument unless you get relic. Other songs aren't usually used all that much. However, if BRD is a main job for you, then getting instruments for Paeon, Mambo, Prelude, Etude, Threnody, Requiem, etc would be a good idea. Getting a String instrument of some kind and using it for Finale would be good too, for skilling String.