Paladin QuestionFollow

I'm a tarutaru Blm/Whm (planning on Rdm) soon, but that's not the point, point is, i'm a Tarutaru. Due to the fact that i have less vit, means i will take more damage when i get hit.
Questions:

1) Like some people say, Paladin can hold aggro but cannot PULL aggro, while a warrior can PULL aggro but cannot hold. How does a paladin hold aggro if he pulls it with provoke. Why? Due to MP/TP conflict. I'm not sure if Pld do contribute to skillchains, but if they do, Curing members help generate and keep aggro, but if they cast Cures, it means using MP, using MP means resting for MP, in turn, it means losing TP. So if they have to do this, by healing MP they are losing TP, how would they be able to skill chain? Or to hold aggro if they are going to take part in a skillchain? A sword may swing fast, but if it doesn't hit for alot of damage, the Pld will not be able to hold the aggro well. Off course, i won't really consider about GSWRDs because they miss quite often. Well, if Pld don't contribute to skillchains, then i believe i can use the sword swings and occasional Cures to keep aggro.

2) Equipments, same, for sword swings to keep aggro, you have to keep dealing decent damage. So herein lies another problem. Should you concentrate on equips that increase your VIT/DEF, or on equips that allows you to deal more damage? I belief that u can never have the best of both worlds. So it's either DEF, or STR, or a mixture of both.

3) Stats, which would be better? Again, it may come down to equips. Does +Evasion items or +Def items be better if you are going concentrate on being a tank?

Lastly, i'm a Tarutaru. Would that affect me in anyway of taking damage? Like if a Galka is to take the same hit from the same monster as compared to a Tarutaru, would a Tarutaru take more damage?? I've picked Tarutaru due to the MP pool they have because i can Cure more so i can hold aggro better, and rest less often. This is what i intend to do if i wish to defeat the MP/TP conflict as i brought up on question 1.

Thanks alot for the replies and answers i get.