you: "so what do you think? does size matter?"
her: "well, it really depends on the guy... sometimes it does and doesn't"
you: "oh, I was talking about breast size. you're already thinking about getting into my pants? geez, you should start by buying me a drink first"
i was thinking more like:
you: ********** this beer has a huge head on it. kind of like me; my glans is enormous!"
you: "my glans. it's like a giant mushroom."
her: "guys are so adolescent, always talking about their ***** size."
you: "no, no, no, hold on. i'm not saying that i have a big *****, per se. like some guys brag about their length like they want to get deep into ***, or their girth like they want to pound on vaginal walls. i'm saying that the head is particularly large. don't put words in my mouth."
her: "WHAT DO YOU WANT IN YOUR MOUTH"
you: "I WANT TO POUR MY MUSHROOM ALL OVER YOUR FACE"
her: "I LOVE YOU, DADDY"