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#7352 Jun 20 2011 at 3:14 PM Rating: Good
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With regards to my brother in law, specifically, I doubt he'd be that much more invested if he had had a boy. I think he's just under the impression that this is how it's supposed to be. And I think he has this ridiculous idea that my sister "asked" him for a child, so it's largely her responsibility, because he didn't want kids that badly.
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#7353 Jun 20 2011 at 3:15 PM Rating: Good
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Its called parenting for a reason. If it was a job for one, it would be called mumming or dadding.
Simple as that.


Honestly, I don't think I would be a great parent. Hence, I choose not to be one.
#7354 Jun 20 2011 at 3:23 PM Rating: Good
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Quote:
Honestly, I don't think I would be a great parent. Hence, I choose not to be one.


Lol, this. I have no intention of having kids. If I ever end up with them, though, I'm not going to just be a passive parent.

To be fair, I think I could be a good parent. I just don't have any particular desire to be one.
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#7355 Jun 20 2011 at 3:26 PM Rating: Excellent
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Wonder Gem PigtailsOfDoom wrote:
Out of curiosity, is your wife a SAHM?


She's a stay at home mom, but yeah that certainly doesn't do it justice.

The taking care of 2 kids is just as hard as what I do during the day; in different ways. I find 2 kids just physically exhausting. Going to the park, changing a diaper, "Can I have juice?" making dinners, "Wash your hands!", clipping coupons for shopping trips, etc. etc. Whereas my job feels more mentally exhausting. I spend most of the time hopping from computer chair to computer chair in relative silence. However trying to think critically about a research project, or troubleshooting a finicky instrument on 5 hours of sleep is a different kind of difficult. No one likes it when you waste thousands of dollars because you forgot to change some instrument setting or search parameter.

Wonder Gem PigtailsOfDoom wrote:
Could just be me, but it seems like that is a much larger issue with dads and their daughters. The type of men who don't want to invest that much time in their children, also tend to be the type who want sons. They want to pass on their legacy or some stupid sh*t like that. More than likely, they'd pay at least some attention to a son, but daughters aren't worth the time.


Never understood this myself. Seems like training your son to be an absentee father isn't going to get anything passed on in the long run. I mean if the wife is doing all the work, who's values do you think the kid is going to have?

Edited, Jun 20th 2011 2:34pm by someproteinguy
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#7356 Jun 20 2011 at 3:34 PM Rating: Good
Hey, it was my mom's idea initially, not mine. =x

I feel bad for your sister then Digg, I couldn't handle being married to a guy like that. It's one of the reasons I talk to boyfriends about kids before I get too attached to them. I want kids in a few years, but I absolutely insist that any partner of mine be invested in raiding our children together.
#7357 Jun 20 2011 at 3:49 PM Rating: Excellent
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Wonder Gem PigtailsOfDoom wrote:
idiggory wrote:
God forbid both parents actually invest equal amounts of time and effort into raising their children.


Seriously. That really sucks Protein. I don't have kids, so I haven't experienced that sort of thing directly, but I definitely can sympathize with being the victim of double-standards. =x It's really lame.


Speaking of double standards, it's not just dads that are dead-beat parents. My kids live with me 5 or 6 days a week, I don't get a dime from my ex, but she's always bragging on facebook about how she's such a great mom because she called and talked to our son the day before his birthday. Not on his birthday, just the day before. And she's missed his last two birthdays because that's the day she married hubby number 3.

She did make sure to call on Father's Day, though, so my kids could talk to their d-bag step-dad.

/rant
#7358 Jun 20 2011 at 3:56 PM Rating: Good
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I doubt they really talked about kids before getting married, at least beyond the barest kinda "having kids would be cool" kind of chat.

The real problem is that he doesn't understand that my sister being good with their daughter, and her being a very maternal sort of person, doesn't excuse him from his own duties. Even if she is prepared, able and willing to cover the main duties (feeding, changing, bathtime, cleaning, etc.), it doesn't excuse him from at least being sure to spend time with her. What disturbs me is that he seems to feel like he does spend enough...

The weirdest part is that he's not an *******. He had a really chaotic (and not necessarily pleasant) childhood, and I doubt he really has a template of fatherhood to work with. It's like he just has some weird mental block where this issue is concerned. And we are DEFINITELY not close enough for me to ever breach this topic.
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#7359 Jun 20 2011 at 3:58 PM Rating: Good
That's very true. My step-sister's mother is kind of similar. My step-dad raised her almost her entire life and didn't get any child support for several years. Until she got a government job, and now they take it out of her paycheck automatically. Even though my sister is 20 now, because she's in school she still gets the child support checks, which is pretty cool.
#7360 Jun 20 2011 at 4:01 PM Rating: Good
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Quote:
Speaking of double standards, it's not just dads that are dead-beat parents. My kids live with me 5 or 6 days a week, I don't get a dime from my ex, but she's always bragging on facebook about how she's such a great mom because she called and talked to our son the day before his birthday. Not on his birthday, just the day before. And she's missed his last two birthdays because that's the day she married hubby number 3.

She did make sure to call on Father's Day, though, so my kids could talk to their d-bag step-dad.

/rant


A. That really sucks, I feel bad for your kids. Fortunately, they have a dad who can take care of them for the majority of the week. :)

B. You just reminded me of a certain type of person I hate. Rich ******* who do NOTHING for the family, her home, career, husband, etc. (I'm sure there are men like this too, I just don't see them on reality shows).

I'm talking about the women who leave nannies to raise their kids, who don't work, who don't cook, who don't clean, etc. What the hell do they contribute to a relationship? What are they even TRYING to contribute? Spending time sitting on a beach or shopping for clothes doesn't do crap for your family.

Don't get me wrong, I'm all for parents being able to have time to themselves. It's just these parents that literally contribute nothing to the family (or even household) that drive me crazy.
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#7361 Jun 20 2011 at 4:08 PM Rating: Good
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idiggory wrote:
I don't get how society expects women who work full time to also:

-Make all the meals
-Keep the house neat/clean
-Raise the children


I don't think society is expecting women to work...
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#7362 Jun 20 2011 at 4:27 PM Rating: Good
That's part of the issue Mazra. If women work, they might have a life outside of the house or their family! Then they might get ideas and then the moral fabric of society and our Christian values will go down the tube!

Of course, this is only an issue for middle and upper class women. Lower class women have always had to work, if they didn't their families wouldn't be able to eat.
#7363 Jun 20 2011 at 4:30 PM Rating: Excellent
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Mazra wrote:
idiggory wrote:
I don't get how society expects women who work full time to also:

-Make all the meals
-Keep the house neat/clean
-Raise the children


I don't think society is expecting women to work...


"You need to get a job, but don't think that means you can skimp on getting the housework done." Is how it feels like it comes across over here. Smiley: rolleyes
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#7364 Jun 20 2011 at 4:37 PM Rating: Excellent
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Wonder Gem PigtailsOfDoom wrote:
That's part of the issue Mazra. If women work, they might have a life outside of the house or their family! Then they might get ideas and then the moral fabric of society and our Christian values will go down the tube!


Ideas are of the devil.
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#7365 Jun 20 2011 at 4:37 PM Rating: Good
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Its not safe outside the kitchen.
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#7366 Jun 20 2011 at 4:38 PM Rating: Good
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It really is quite insane. >.<

P.S. No, really, where the hell is Aeth? He hasn't been around in 10 days. If he doesn't come back soon, he's going to lose a rank to Kelvy, who's only 15 posts behind him...
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Anyways, you all are horrible, @#%^ed up people

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#7367 Jun 20 2011 at 4:51 PM Rating: Good
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Its not safe outside the kitchen.


Seriously, I feel so much safer doing dishes in my go-go boots and apron than going outside.

I wouldn't be as worried about Aeth's absence if he at least had some activity on Facebook... that's the majority of the reason I'm paranoid something happened to him. But I suppose if something had, the people he knows irl would have been posting **** on his wall about it too.
#7368 Jun 20 2011 at 4:52 PM Rating: Good
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Wonder Gem PigtailsOfDoom wrote:
Hey, it was my mom's idea initially, not mine. =x

I feel bad for your sister then Digg, I couldn't handle being married to a guy like that. It's one of the reasons I talk to boyfriends about kids before I get too attached to them. I want kids in a few years, but I absolutely insist that any partner of mine be invested in raiding our children together.

This sounds full of awesomeness.
#7369 Jun 20 2011 at 5:02 PM Rating: Excellent
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Wonder Gem PigtailsOfDoom wrote:
lolgaxe wrote:
Its not safe outside the kitchen.


Seriously, I feel so much safer doing dishes in my go-go boots and apron than going outside.


POIDH

Smiley: sly



Edited, Jun 20th 2011 4:03pm by someproteinguy
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#7370 Jun 20 2011 at 5:09 PM Rating: Good
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Maybe Kali knows where Aeth is.

Haven't seen him on FB in ages either.

Btw, did any of you get a PM from a certain admin about a certain thing? (Not related to Aeth's disappearance, I'm merely derailing my own post here)

Edited, Jun 21st 2011 1:10am by Mazra
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#7371 Jun 20 2011 at 5:12 PM Rating: Good
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Nope, JEALOUS.
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Anyways, you all are horrible, @#%^ed up people

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#7372 Jun 20 2011 at 5:17 PM Rating: Good
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This thread is now about redheads with green eyes wearing corsets and knee-high socks.
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IDrownFish wrote:
Anyways, you all are horrible, @#%^ed up people

lolgaxe wrote:
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#7373 Jun 20 2011 at 5:42 PM Rating: Good
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idiggory wrote:
This thread is now about redheads with green eyes wearing corsets and knee-high socks.


I approve.

Bring in the redheads.
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#7374 Jun 20 2011 at 5:49 PM Rating: Good
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I'm all for the redhead from that pokemans show.
Screenshot
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#7375 Jun 20 2011 at 5:56 PM Rating: Good
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I'm amazed you didn't link this one instead.
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IDrownFish wrote:
Anyways, you all are horrible, @#%^ed up people

lolgaxe wrote:
Never underestimate the healing power of a massive dong.
#7376 Jun 20 2011 at 6:07 PM Rating: Good
Mazra wrote:


Btw, did any of you get a PM from a certain admin about a certain thing? (Not related to Aeth's disappearance, I'm merely derailing my own post here)


I did, but I feel pretty meh about it. Might actually take a look at it in a few days.

RE: raiding children together. Whoops, must have been a Freudian slip. =x
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