well, my mom and i (my mom was the DD for the night) went to the hofbrau haus in vegas. our waitress (or in this case, beermaiden) was named peggy, and she was ten kinds of cute and awesome. busty enough to make a man forget his troubles. naturally curly brunette, and with a ready smile and a helluva batters arm (this will be relevant later).
i started out ordering two shots of jager; one for me, and one for kitty (yes, that is actually the real name of my friend). as per tradition at the hofbrau haus in las vegas, taking a shot of jager means your beermaiden gets to paddle your ass, and peggy did not disappoint.
dinner consisted of a liter of the lager and their nurnburger sausages, complete with saurkraut and garlic mashed potatoes. desert consisted of another two shots; apple schnapps this time, complete with another two paddlings from peggy (one for tradition and one because kitty probably would have said i needed another one anyway).
peggy then asked if there was anything else i needed to which i replied in my suave drunkenness "aside from lunch with you, no, we're good, thanks." her expression told me that i was going to be rejected, so i played it off as a joke, but the risk was worth it regardless; this girl is seriously cute and awesome.
the night ended with peggy telling us she would keep the two filled shots of jager and apple schnapps on the table as long as she could. i bade her farewell and my mom and i drove home.
im also fairly drunk. who knew two shots of hard liquor and a liter of 9% alcohol beer would do that to you?
The thing about me is that apparently it's very hard to tell when I'm drunk. So I feel like I'm walking sideways on a UFO and everyone else sees me doing the robot like a pro.
i have bathed in the blood of many. my life was spent well.
feral druids do it on all fours.
The One True Prophet of Tonkism. http://therewillbebrawl.com/