Let me handle those one at a time...
So i booted it up and started playing again but the one thing that I still can't get over now is the graphics. They seem out dated when compared to whats new out there....
Depending on what level of quality you play on, that would affect the graphics quite a lot. I play on "High Quality" when not in a raid, or intense group. To be honest I have not seen any game that has comparable graphics (aside from maybe Crysis). I was playing the Rift beta and it looked exactly the same on equal settings. Maybe the spells were a bit more flashy, but in all honesty if you are playing a game for that reason then perhaps EQ2 isn't the best option for you (not trying to sound rude there, sorry if I did).
1- Turn on Alternate Models
2- Try running on a higher quality graphic setting.
3- Try out some of the newer zones, instead of old world content.
For the entire month of Febuary the game has run like crap. First they did a "loader upgrade" that caused the game to crash every time you went to the New Halas map. Now that they supposedly fixed it the time to move from zone to zone is as high as 30-40 min virtually making the game unplayable. The rub is Sony has said they have a fix for it, for the past week, but won't take the time to fix it because they are too busy with the new expansion. This is the worst customer support and game performance that I have ever seen. As a lame attempt to placate the outraged customers they have made everything double experience but that is meaningless if you can't play the game, isn't it?
I'm sorry you are having these issues. Perhaps you could give us some more information, such as your system specs and what graphic detail you are running the game at. I have NEVER had a 30 minute load time even zoning into raid zones (thats with 23 other people loading in at the same time). If you are playing the 'streaming launcher' then that is your biggest issue right there. Try downloading the full game.
Also that really isnt very constructive to just say what you dont like about the game, without adding feedback as to what you think may be causing it.